Mike, Jess, Hailey, & Ryker

should have knocked...

2012-01-29T18:25:00.000-08:00

on virtual wood.
Well, after I wrote this, my dear Hailey started not feeling well. She didn't even want to eat her favorite Roast Beef sandwich, from Arby's.
I thought this would happen when I was writing. She didn't throw up until this morning, and even then she only threw up once. She hates to throw up, so she closes her eyes and breathes deep. We cuddled all day, as we drifted in and out of watching tv and Ryker ride his hopper, pretending he was the Best Bull rider EVER.
She is feeling better tonight, but still not 100%, hopefully this is over.....
I feel a dun, dun, dun, coming on......

Hopefully, it's a done, done, done.

Too much for paragraphs

2012-01-28T15:48:00.000-08:00

Ryker had pneumonia and had to go to the hospital for a "sleep over" ( well him and I). He had a 105.3 fever, I didn't know that was even possible.
It all started with a cold...he came home after one night of observation and not a lot of sleep, at his sleep over.
with IV holes
oxygen- "oxy-dog"
breathing treatments
and three antibiotics
and a pro biotic
he had to get breathing treatments around the clock, so that was on me, mommy nurse duties. I was too worried about him. He really scared us this time.
I keep thinking that I will know how to handle things when they come, and I just kind of float thru them, not realizing what is happening. I know how to work oxygen now, I guess I can mark that off.
I had to miss the kindergarten field trip, it was a sad day. No one felt comfortable in watching Ryker and oxy-dog and I had to explain to Hailey that I really wanted to go, but I just can't. Instead me and Ryker cuddled, not only on that morning, but for a whole week and a half, just cuddling, no running, cleaning, preparing big lovely meals, nada, just reading with Hailey and cuddling.
He is better, and dressing up as soldiers, army anything, and his imagination is going wild. I really missed him, and I am so glad that we ended up taking him to the doctor that night. Believe it or not, I tried cancelling the appointment three different times, and just gave up because I couldn't get through, a sign people a sign.
I prayed for an answer that morning on my long run, "let me know what to do with Ryk, and if we need to take him to the doctor."
He answers. He really answers.
I am so grateful for that, and the spirit, that brings such peace. I am grateful for the priesthood blessing that Mike and my dad gave him. I am grateful for two healthy and happy and very wild little kids. They bring me such happiness, I don't know what life would be like without them, and I don't want to find out.

Highlights this month:
mike turned 33
mike has started his own insurance business, which includes a lot of states, and many different companies, let us know if you want a quote, he saves people all kinds of crazy money.
Ryker is better
Hailey is full on reading and excelling in her class
Hailey has a lot of crushes
we made valentines and she may have told me to put on one I am your cutie pie, and on another one I dig you
i may have done it
i ran 9 miles today and am feeling great
it is 19 degrees but it looks heavenly outside, these are the moments when I tell them Heavenly Father is tricking us, put on your coats.
I love my life. I am getting to the point where I love every part of it, even my pant size, not there yet, but getting more comfortable with me. This is HUGE, I am getting there guys.
Also, I am not a reader, but I have managed since August to:
start and finish all four books of the Twilight series. I know right.
start and finish the first two books of the Hunger Games, and am currently on the third.
we have started to read the Book of Mormon as a FAMILY and we are in Alma.

Running, fantasitc!!

2012-01-03T10:11:00.000-08:00

Soooo, on the last day of break for the kiddos, we took it easy. We watched football, ate pizza, got hair cuts, and just relaxed. This weekend I taught the kids chinese checkers, slap jack, and uno. It was a lot of fun, and they love them. They want to play them all of the time.
We don't have any video games or anything like that, so we have family fun time, the old fashioned way. I don't want them in the house and have them obsess over them and then have zombies for kids. I will get them when they are older, but for now, all the games can wait until they are begging me for them. Who knows, maybe that will be sooner than later.
I heard of a good idea though yesterday getting my hair cut- thanks Julie. Let them play for however minutes they read or do homework! Awesome idea..I hope to remember that.
Anyway on to the title of the post. I felt like going for a run yesterday, and the kids wanted to come. I grabbed the stroller, and to my surprise they grabbed their running clothes, and running shoes. I was too excited. We ran for a mile and a half, it took 16 minutes without breaks except for lights of course, they are fast little runners, and just too fun. I hope they will always be my running partners. I loved it, probably one of my favorite memories with them.
I am afraid that they will be faster than me soon though, they will need a better coach soon. I wonder how early is too early for cross country. I would love to watch little kids running....such a healthy thing to do.
They are signed up for a mile run in may, they will do great.
Biggest Loser starts tonight....I am a little excited for it.

A lot of crazy stuff!!

2011-12-23T11:34:00.000-08:00

This past month has been crazy busy-in a good way. We have done a lot, and have gotten a lot done. We have served a lot and have had service done to us in secret. We went to see the new chipmunk movie, even though Ryker was throwing up on Thursday night, we decided he was okay to go, but to be honest he just cuddled the whole time, and had a little fever. We went to a buffet dinner after that, he ate soda crackers and a roll. He did have a good time though. I have to say though, I never knew that I depended so much on my car. Mikes car is down as of Monday, and he has taken mine, which has been hard, getting kids ready at the perfect time to get to the bus, and pray for the weather to be bearable, not a blizzard. We were lucky that this week was a short week, and that we have been home bodies lately. We have had to plan rides and ask people to help us out, which is not a strong point, I love to help someone, but I feel embarrassed to get help. My mom had to take us to the concert, and I had to go grocery shopping at 10:00 one night, because the kids were asleep, mike was home, and I had a car, and lastly we needed food. It has just taken a lot more planning. I am fine without a car when it is not winter, I ran everywhere for 8 months, in the summer and fall time. I just have issues running with the jogger in snow, maybe I need snow tires!!!
I am grateful that it happened this week, and where it happened, (in the garage), nothing too busy and not to hard of a week to share a car. I was just tested and thrown off a bit.
Hailey has been going to choir and got a speaking part in the concert. Well, the concert was on wednesday and she nailed her part. "His eyes how they twinkled, his dimples how merry, his cheeks were like roses his nose like a cherry, his droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow, and the beard of his chin was as white as snow."
She got a little nervous at first then she did great. She had to do it in front of the whole school and the parents, needless to say a lot of people. I had teary eye proud eyes, I was thrilled to watch her, she had a great time.
Then that night......the fun began. She threw up more times than I could count, it got everywhere. I did three loads of laundry, from midnight to three in the morning. We ended up going to sleep on the couch, just us, wondering when I would have to hand her the bowl. She ended up throwing up like every half an hour all night long. Poor thing, nothing left was in her, it was hard to watch.
Then we started getting things to stay down her, I prayed sooooo hard, I just wanted her to be able to keep down fluids, and go to the bathroom. I didn't want a doctor visit. My mom was nice enough to bring her sprite, and 7-up, and some medicine, thanks for helping us mom. She still had a fever last night, but we made it the whole day without throwing up. She did so great. I slept out in the front room with her again, just in case she needed anything.
This morning she is better than before. Lots of energy, lots of playing and even getting noisy, which if you have kids is so nice to see after they are not moving, and making weird noises all night and all day. She for sure has her health back. I am so glad that we didn't have to go to the hospital for dehydration, or to the doctor and run a strep test, she hates that test. Did you moms out there know that little kids normally throw up with strep throat, I have found this to be so true.
Anyway, nothing the the 24 hour flu to make you feel so grateful for your kids health, and that seeing them move and talk is amazing. I would like to give a shout out to my washer and dryer, you have worked over time, and I thank you. Also, to my little Lysol sprayer (Ryker), getting all the germies out, he has been great. I just hope we can keep them away!
I hope you all have a healthy and merry christmas.

Ryker is 4!!

2011-11-15T13:22:00.000-08:00

Ryker is 4 today! I can't help but think that the first blog we did was introduce him to the world. I cannot believe how fast time has gone, I know everyone says that, but I remember everyday with my kids and I can't believe we have had so many of them together.
Ryker wanted an ice skating party this year. On Saturday night we had both sides of family over, we went ice skating, and we had dinner, cake and cream puffs at our house. I cannot believe how comfortable he is on the ice! He was flying around the ice, in his hockey outfit. I really need to get him back into his hockey classes, and let him enjoy it. He was falling and smiling the entire time. He had sooo much fun with his cousins and aunts and uncles, and mom, and dad even tried. I was so glad we got to do something he loves too much.
Ryker is so kind, and sweet. He has a wrestle side that comes out when he is around any adult male, and loves sports of any kind. He always tells me, "I am Ryker and I play all sports." Heavenly Father knew to send him to me, because he is so kind, and loving towards me. He loves to hug, cuddle, and give me kisses on the cheek. He tells me all of the time, "I love you to the light", we read that book, I love you to the moon and back, and I guess his ceiling light is far away in his eyes.
He really protects his sister Hailey, and really misses her. For his birthday today, he wanted to play with her at recess, so I took him up there. He had so much fun with her, and it was fun to surprise her. I took him for a cinnamon roll, to chick fil a and to get ice cream. He is for sure mine, he shares my love of food.
We love you to the light and back, Ryker. Happy 4th birthday!!!!
love-mom, dad, and howie

Wow, my life is taken over.....

2011-11-03T16:08:00.000-07:00

by KINDERGARTEN!!! between taking her to and from the bus stop, and volunteering, and halloween parties, i just need to remember to breathe! i would not change it for anything though. i have been on field trips and to the school and am so grateful that she has good friends and a wonderful teacher. i have ryker in school on wednesdays and he loves it. i don't know what to do with my time, really, i don't. the first time without both of them, it felt wierd running without them, really odd. i am so grateful i am a mom and that i get to be invloved in their little lives!
so much has gone on:
halloween came and went. ryker was bumblebee the transformer and hailey was ariel. they were so cute, and loved trick or treating.
i have to go and be a mom now, but i will update again, sometime soon, hopefully.

challenge!

2011-09-12T12:20:00.000-07:00

I challenge you to a week of no TV, we did it, and it was great and hard. The first day, the kids asked me like 20 times to plug it in, the next day it was cut in half, and by the end of the week, they knew that a no in the morning was a no all day. It was great, we played more, talked more, and we imagined together. I really got to know what goes on in their heads. I took on the challenge too, no late night nothing for me. I missed a lot! Or did I? I got some sleep, and I was refreshed. I tell you, after Haileys party on Saturday, the BYU game was on and I hated to hear the noise! What a crazy thing.
Also, why did we do this? My kids love tv, and I love it too, but we needed to see that we can really function without it. I have been thinking about doing a no check blog week or Internet week. I feel that electronics have just taken over, I don't even have video games, I can only imagine that being a huge problem.
Parents: I would love to hear your comments on this, do you ever just want to throw everything out the "window", facebook, my space, blogging, tv in general, wii, playstation, x box, kinect, there are probably more, but I don't know of them. How much time do we all spend on these fun/relaxing things.
Just a thought.

Six

2011-09-12T12:05:00.000-07:00

Hailey turned six on Saturday. I cannot believe she is six. We had a busy day, starting off with a 5k. She has always wanted to run one, she made it almost 2 miles, and then need to rest. She did a really great job. Then we went to a bridal shower for a friend. Ryker and Mike went up to watch Hockey at the nearby ice rink. That was fun to see them and meet them there after the shower.
Then the preparation for the party began. We filled water balloons, put chairs up, got the slip n slide ready, and got the pink lemonade mixed, and everything else ready.
The party started and everything went great. We did a craft, then they did the slip n slide, then to spice things up, hula hoop contest and jump rope contests! It was a great time, and she got a lot of really nice things, her friends and family are really too kind. Then we did the cake! She wanted a slip n slide cake, well I made a "wedding cake" as she calls it. We used 3 cake mixes and did a fun layer cake. She colored a picture to tell me what she wanted it to look like. I think it went pretty good, I am not a professional by any means. Then it started to rain, thank goodness the party was almost over and that we had a covered patio.
Then the night time came, and well we were just beat. I really had no energy left, I cleaned in slow motion, and then we got ready for bed. My sweet sister called to talk to Hailey and wish her a happy birthday. Then my other sweet sister called and asked if she could take Hailey shopping and for ice cream. My first thought was, oh she needs her sleep. But, I let her, and she let me and Ryker tag along and be the paparazzi, it was so fun. I am so grateful for 5 sweet sisters and for all the family that came and supported our little Hailey.
I love her too much! I cannot believe I have been a mom for six years, crazy! Hailey is so kind, loving, driven and knows what she wants. I love her to pieces, she is a great friend, and an awesome sister and a great daughter. She loves to cuddle and hug, and have the attention on her all of the time. She is great with her brother, and she has great ideas. I love having her in my home, and I love being her mom. I cannot believe it has been this long, since the doctor handed me a sweet little baby angel. I remember everyday with her, and they all went too fast. I do love the stage she is in, loving to learn, growing everyday, she is so smart, and hilarious!!
I will post pictures soon, I cannot do a birthday post without some awesome pictures of her party and just how cute she is, love her.

Brave panties were on today!

2011-08-29T08:43:00.001-07:00

Today was an EPIC day, for all people who worry just a little bit more than average.
Hailey started kindergarten. Last night she received a blessing from her dad, and she said a prayer also, and she included, "please help mom to be brave, brave, brave, super brave," I know she is so ready and will love just every second of it but:
she rides a bus....
she is so small....
she is so sassy....
and loves attention....
and loves to talk....
she did great this morning. She got talking to some of the primary kids on the bus and they are the 5th and 6th graders on the bus, and got on with them. Not before a hug though, Ryker gave her the sweetest big hug too. They held hands the entire way to the bus stop, and of course had their backpacks, both of them. I think Ryker thought he was going to go too.
So, I talked with the bus driver and asked him what the drop off directions were, and asked if I could see where she ended up. All the rest of the kindergartners were at the front, not my Hailey, in the middle of the bus, with two older kids on each side of her. I took a picture, and she said, "mom, why are you on the bus, seriously?"
I laughed and got off the bus, and took Ryker for a run, we were talking the whole time, he was squirting me with the squirt gun, and told me the way to go, something that he never gets to do, and he got us back home.
He and I have never had this time before, just us. I have loved being at home with my kids, and this half day kindergarten is going to be so great for her, and I have to believe it will be good for all of us.
Today I will wear my brave panties, all while praying to Heavenly Father with gratitude that I didn't cry my eyes out, and to please watch over her, because I can't.
Does it ever get any easier, parents with older kids?

Mmmmmmmm....

2011-07-20T16:43:00.000-07:00

So, I put together this yummy sandwich, and I had to share.

Ingredients:
Baguette
artichoke hearts-canned
tomato
oregano
olive oil
white wine vinegar
provolone cheese
turkey-I added
ham-I added
purple onion
banana peppers-canned

You put the artichoke hearts, tomato, olive oil, vinegar, along with oregano in a bowl, and let them sit together.
I sliced the purple onion in rings, and added to the sandwich.
It was pictured with this mixture and only provolone cheese, well I added the sliced lunch meat, oh, sooooo good.
Mike added banana peppers to his, he loved it as well.
I should have taken a picture, but we ate it too fast!!

This is a way to have a great dinner without having to turn on your oven in this hot summer heat....I had to though, I made chicken on bleu, for my kids. They ate it up though.

Hope you are all enjoying the summer!!

9 years!

2011-06-28T07:04:00.000-07:00

Today Mike and i celebrate 9 years together being married. We cannot believe it has been this long, and that it hasn't been longer....does that even make sense? Together we have grown up, raised 2 awesome kids, and have become a fun family. Sure, we have our ups and downs but who doesn't. I have some hard days with the kids, and with all the STRESS that comes with life....but who doesn't. I love my family and wouldn't know what to do without them.
I was explaining to Ryker and Hailey that Mike and I were married in the LDS Bountiful Temple, and that we are a forever family, and Ryker came and hugged me, and so sweetly said, "thanks mom." Ryker always asks about death and when he dies are we going to get another Ryker, and if I would miss him....well, I would miss my family and we could not replace anyone, but we have the knowledge that we GET to be together forever. It is soooo nice and wonderful knowing that.
Today I want to be a mom and a wife, not an exerciser, not an individual, just who I have become these last 9 years, and 5 years of being a mommy. I am living the dream that I have always wanted.
Please tell me, what do I have to complain about. This is really a good life!
(If you haven't heard that song, you should, it's by One Republic, I play it often as a good reminder.)
I LOVE YOU MIC!! Thanks for all of your hard work, so that I can stay home,and have the best life, EVER!!!
JEB
ps along with 9 years comes some awesome alter names.

Here comes the Sun!!!

2011-06-06T14:44:00.000-07:00

We have had sun lately, and it has been sooooo great. We have spent a lot of time outside and can't wait to bring out the swim stuff. The kids start swim lessons tonight and it is just in time, we did get summer weather this year,(I had my doubts) and so we will be able to go to the pools and SWIM!!!
We planted a garden, and with all the crazy weather who knows what will grow, and live. I think our cucumbers are already gone. I have hopes that our tomatoes will still grow but really who knows. I think that our peas will make it....oh, it was fun planting and weeding the garden, anyway. It teaches the kids, right?
So, I think that I have talked too much about me and my problems on this blog, so today I am going to talk about progress and solutions.
Really, things are going great, probably the best ever, actually!! I have done really well. I have been going to the doctor, and he said that he had seen progress and that he recommended some counseling with an eating disorder counselor. Well, I didn't want to do counseling alone. So, I had gone to a couple of eating disorder groups, with the 12 step program that my church puts out.(LDS) It has been amazing, and I feel that I have come thru a lot of the "core" of the problem. I think that addiction is addiction and that even if the topic is not the addiction you are working with you still can be healed, it is pretty amazing how it works. So, the class is every week here, and in some areas every day. It has been so great to see that others are being healed and getting over their addictions and not getting stuck, it is great to have the atonement working in your life. I encourage anyone who is having a problem, whether you feel that it is an addiction or not, these classes have the spirit, and they work wonders. My mom has been going with me up here, and it is for supporters of people with addictions too, really this program helps all of us.
I don't know why I felt to put this in my blog, I just know that it is working for me, I am a believer. These classes help me see me and anyone that is in my life the way our Heavenly Father and Jesus see us. We need to be gentle with ourselves, and others. I have always tried my best to be gentle with others, but I have had a hard time loving myself, and thinking I don't deserve things. Well, my attitude is changing, and I feel that I am deserving of things and that I am a nice person. I feel like I am being cocky but really it has been a week, that I look in the mirror and think wow, you are pretty, guys, this has never happened...
I feel that I have made big progress, and you can too, we all tend to hide our problems really well. Tell people about it and share with your friends and family and you will feel soooo much better. I do.
I hope someday to go to a store and try on a pair of levis and not be scared to buy them, and not be worried about the size.....I will, the Lord will help me....hopefully soon.
Thanks for all of your comments and support. I am a different person, a lot happier and easier going.

Rainy old days, are getting well, old!

2011-05-10T13:32:00.000-07:00

I am so tired of all this rain. I am grateful for it, but man, floods everywhere, and the rivers are just too high, not to mention the gray skies, and no going outside to play, no shorts and no sun. I need spring, I love love love it. I need to get my stroller fixed and get on long runs while pushing before it gets too hot, that we completely missed our lovely spring runs!
Ryker really wants to ride his new bike, a two wheeler with training wheels, and Hailey needs to get back on her bike. She fell a few times last week, and I want her to get comfortable and used to it, so she is not afraid of it. She got back on right after it, but I still want her to ride before she won't get on again.
I am proud of my kids for even wanting to ride bikes. I am so afraid of them, don't tell my kids, but I won't get on one, let alone go as fast as they do. That story will have to be for a later time, but this is the reason I do not do triathlons.
I am waiting for spring to well, spring.
I love my kids, and we had a blast today at the treehouse. It was fun to let them explore and to see their imagination come alive.
My preschool is coming to an end. It is sad really, Ryker will go to real preschool next year, and my dear Hailey is having her assessment next week for Kindergarten. Did you know that kindergarten is not required? I did not. i have heard this from a few parents who are great sources and I believe it, but I just didn't know that. What are your feelings about this, I think I will have her go because she needs the social right? Doesn't kindergarten offer a lot? She did just miss the deadline....oh..man.so confused. If only she would have been born on her due date, August 27....she came September 10....ya, don't ask!
Sorry for the tangent....
She is so excited and ready for it. We have been practicing her sight words and letter sounds and writing and writing her letters and numbers. She can count to 100, with a little help, and today she counted by two's to 20. I will miss her though, she has been fun watching. I am sad that Ryker is going to a real preschool, it has been fun helping him and watching him grow. He knows how to write some letters, knows his alphabet, can count to 30, and knows a lot of songs. He is going to be ready for his class.
Anyway, thought I would post something. I am waiting for the kids to go shopping with me, and then off to ice skating tonight. They have soooo much fun doing this. I love to see them having fun, and enjoying life.

Busy April and May!

2011-05-04T15:20:00.000-07:00

We have had a busy month.
We have been here and there and everywhere. I am glad that we am home and we can get back in the swing of things, the routines and all. Last week we had spring break.
Mike started an insurance company, and he is doing awesome, he will be certified soon. It has been a lot of long days with my two buddies and not a lot of daddy and husband time.
We have almost concluded a session of learning to skate. The kids are doing great. I have met a lot of awesome hockey moms and they are so sweet to my little family. Hailey really seems to like it, and Ryker is getting more comfortable on the ice. He is still wearing his hockey gear EVERYWHERE, and getting all sorts of awesome comments. Hailey started skating backwards last night, it was great to see her and feel her confidence.
We went down to my sister in laws house and sewed capes for her little guys super hero party. It was a lot of fun.
I got some more of Haileys' quilt done, it's getting there.
I found some time to run. okay, confession, a lot!
I took the kids running today and at the end Ryker was pushing the stroller and ran it into the curb, wow, front wheel totally came off. I feel like my stroller is totaled. I am glad that we have a car and that we can still get around and that I have a treadmill. I hope it is an easy fix and will be ready for the 5k on Saturday.
We went to a funeral, of our dear former neighbor.
We all went Easter at Mike's parents, and had a lot of fun.
We went to a special event for Mike's family.
We went to Mike's work and had a picnic with him.
Hailey has learned to ride her big bike without training wheels, it is so cute. She goes really fast, it is kind of scary. She loves it.
I have done a lot of yard work, and if I don't say so myself, it looks awesome. I have already mowed the lawn, and another lawn in Orem. I sure love yard work, and the beauty of it all. I helped my sister in law with her yard, and she helped me mow the lawn, for her FIRST time ever. It was great to see that now she has the confidence to mow her lawn. It is sooooo rewarding!!!
We have went to the library, the dinosaur park, the nature center, and many grocery stores, and a few Costco's. It has been quite busy, but we all survived.
I know this is all just the daily stuff, but I am glad that we can come home, and relax. I have been stressed out, on getting here and there on time, and getting the kids to eat in between. I am tired of saying "please, listen to me" "please, be quiet" "please, hurry" "stop screaming" "be careful" and "please, go to sleep, it's time" "don't walk on the tile with ice skates, only carpet".
I am happier than I have been in a long time. I am getting there people, I am. It has been five months of exploring "me", but I am almost there. I am also more tired than I have been in a long time. I love being a mom, but wow, I am sure spent. I hope other moms feel this way.
Happy mothers day to everyone. I am grateful for my mom, and all that she did for me and continues to do. I love you so much. I am grateful for my California mom as well, man I love her and miss her.

Dear Mr. 9:30-10:00,

2011-04-14T08:44:00.000-07:00

I call you a mister because I don't think that a misses would be so mean! Mother Nature is beautiful, so, she, naturally, is a woman, but time goes too fast and is not so patient, your a man.
I really dislike you, no matter the day, no matter how much I have done and how tired I am, I eat, eat like a crazy person!
I love nachos, cinnamon rolls, a bowl of oatmeal, really anything. I have tried an apple or banana, but that does not satisfy you.
You screw up my whole day, I do really, really good and then you come around!
Every night I think I am going to beat you, and then I give in and guess what? You win, and have won for a very long time.
I used to be soooo good, not eating anything after 7:00, and then I fell out of habit, and I fell into your trap.
I have a love/hate relationship really. I love to feel full, but I hate the calories I sleep on every night.
I need to do better AND I will. Starting tonight, because anyone can start on MONDAY, why not start today, Thursday?
Tonight I will conquer! Or, maybe I will just go to bed. Either way, you are so going down!!

Let's switch the topic:
MOTIVATION what is it exactly?
Many people tell me that I motivate them. I was told this in the last 3 places I have lived, is this a good thing or bad? I don't know if I am so crazy addicted to exercise that people just say that to make me feel good, or if I really am motivating them. I just recently moved as a lot of you know, and this has once again been brought up, I have got in touch with some high school friends and they want to run with me, and lose weight, they say they want to work out with me. I was shopping at a grocery store I used to work at and two girls want to run with me, one of them ran a 5k with me, and she said that I "pushed" her and helped her sooo much. (We finished at 28 flat! I wish I would have sprinted the last mile like I normally do, but that is fine, we finished and we felt great. Last week I ran a 25 min 3 miler, it felt so great.)
I need someone to motivate me, to be healthier and to actually count on me to do good and be good with my food choices.
Two of them just ran in with sunglasses and goggles and a hammer, and let's not forget the bandana. My family SHOULD be the most important motivator. I need to get my life in order.
As you can tell, I am still really trying to figure things out. I am getting better though. I got my scale back, and it is good just to have the option of getting on or just letting it collect dust. I still weigh 141, but that is just because of my awesome eating habits. I need to be healthier.

On a much happier note:

HOCKEY has begun! We got Ryker into developmental hockey classes, and he and Hailey are both in ice skating lessons. They do sooooo good. Hailey amazed me, she just got on the ice and went for it, if she were to fall, she just got right back up! Ryker is a little bit more hesitant, but on Tuesday he was skating by himself. He is scared of falling, but he has all the hockey pads, helmet, and gloves on, it's really cute looking. (He really has nothing to be afraid of except for having sooo much on that he can't move if he fell, Ralphie anyone?) He and Hailey have made instant friends at the skating rink, and Ryker has a lot of "hockey buddies."
People are so nice in this hockey family. We were given hockey pads, 2 pairs of skates, and this sweet lady said she has pants, gloves, and a helmet. How nice is that? I am impressed with rough and tough hockey parents and children and young adults. Ryker had an amazing two nights, and Hailey "loves to dance on ice."
We are doing great and hope that spring wants to come soon, oh, how we want be be outside. Mike is starting an insurance business so this week has brought new habits, and new routines, but we are soooo excited for him, and we are happy he is happy.
Sorry if you felt like I am rambling, I just need to figure things out and where I want to be and who I want to be.

Family

2011-03-22T13:25:00.000-07:00

I am so grateful that I know that we have forever families and that I have my little family forever. My Uncle Bob passed away on Saturday, from a hard, battle with Cancer. He and his family are so strong, they are seriously boulders, they know that plan, and they are all at peace. I am sad for them, but they are comforting others! They are such a great example of faith, love, and hope, and how a marriage should be. I was talking with my aunt, and expressing if Mike were sick, I hope I could be like her, loving and caring, and serviceable, and forgetting myself, and living without regret. She said that she doesn't have one single regret of their life together or their marriage, wow. I said that I would probably be angry, feeling anxious, and moody, if I had to go through something like that. She said, "Jess, I have never known you to be mad, or moody." If only that were true......
I hope I can learn how to live that life that I am supposed to live. I am sure trying. We had a lesson on Sunday in relief society about Charity. I was telling Mike how charity never ends and never really starts, it's just in us, and he said, is it even there? Yes, it is, but we need to develop it, and it truly is the pure love of Christ. In the lesson also, was a comment that charity begins in the home, with our family. She is a young mother of two and one on the way, and her husband is in his second year of residency! I thought of that Sunday morning, Ryker crying all night long, and I didn't get up a few times, to go and comfort him, and I thought, if it starts in the home, then this morning I am a failure of charity.
Life is getting in more of a routine here, running has started up again, watching what I eat has begun again, well, more portion control, I stop myself when I feel full, and a new weight lifting thing is going on. Is it normal for your neck to get bigger? -total side note- I am trying to live just to live not to live to try to get to that size 6 again. I just need to be comfortable in my size 8 new skin.-or old skin stretched however you look at it- I need to remember I used to be a size 18, and 175, and I delivered Hailey at 215+ I stopped weighing myself 10 days over due, and I went 15 days over due. I delivered Ryker at 145, but, wait, I am almost 145, or at least a month ago I was. So what does this all mean, well, I honestly don't know, but I know it weighs a lot on my heart and nerves. I just want to weigh myself, and make sure it is going down and not going up. What would happen though if it did go up, would I be a different person, I know that I am different than the size 18, 175 girl, she had fun, she was carefree, and outgoing, didn't worry about anything. The mom, wife, sister, daughter, is very different now, and now the road begins to find herself and make some difference in this world, starting in my own little house, along with charity.
Hailey was saying a prayer, and she said Heavenly Father and Jesus, please take care of Uncle Bob like a mom would. Oh, and we are so glad that his Cancer is away, and that he is healthy again. This is why we are to become as children, so caring, honest, sensitive, loving, charitable, and soooooo forgiving.
Tonight I will love my family more, and serve them with a smile. We are so great together, and we have forever to be better.
Off to feed the ducks.
PS: This morning we spent a lot of time in our backyard playing in the snow, Ryker made a snowman with four parts, in a while it fell over, and he laughed and laughed, sooooo cute. I pulled the kiddos on a sled for a long time, that alone is a workout, the best workout ever, hearing laughter is such great medicine. I do hope though, that this was our last snow storm.
We can have fun in the spring too, right?

Fresh start!

2011-02-28T07:43:00.000-08:00

new home.
new rules, no food anywhere, the kitchen is where it is made and where it stays.
new eating habits need to start.
new trails for running need to be found.
new driveway to shovel.
new rooms, they love having their own rooms.
new quality of life.
new dreams at night, we all sleep soooo good here.
new friends.
new ward. (same songs, hailey was amazed!)
new garbage day.
new recycle can.
new commute.
new found sunshine.
new beautiful lit buildings at night and in the am, hailey loves to see the lights of buildings, we were in the basement before.
new sunsets in rykers room. he loves to see it every night, and we all watch it together.
new big yard.
new double garage.
new shed.
new.
we miss the old.
miss seeing grandpa, and mikes family.
old neighborhood.
old routines.
old ward, who helped move us, thank you sooo much.
old big door that my jogger could fit through with ease.
former friends, because we are not old, we miss you all.
former running friends, some i didn't even get to say goodbye.
old runs, man, i had those things clocked and timed, with and without jogger.

same old stuff just a new place for all of them to happen and be in. we love our new house and a fresh start. we are excited, and ready for our new life and new adventures. it is great to live so close to my family. love, love, love it!

we had sooo much help with moving out and moving in. thank you to all of you who helped, and gave to our family a lot of your time and back muscles. we love and appreciate everything. we had people come up from orem to help us, yes they traveled....can you even believe that? i am so amazed with the generous people in this world, and i am grateful that they are our lifer friends. i hope i can help them one day, and show them how grateful we are.

i exercised for an hour this morning, with unpacking and everything, haven't had much time for that, hopefully i can make that a new routine. i only exercised two times last week, it was sad for me, i had to tell myself that moving furniture, and unpacking and moving my body all day was still exercise. i was not too convincing, but the treats were, holy cow, too many treats last week. i am trying to be better, i need to. i have had some issues with this section of my life to say the least. i will be better.
fresh start, remember?

What a new post? Are you for real?

2011-02-07T07:22:00.000-08:00

We have been busy here:
Christmas was great, and the new year brought new projects to mind, and new goals. Mike is starting a business, and that was number one, to get it rolling and registered. I had my own plans, run faster and longer, eat better, stop buying those yummy junk foods that I always bring home, make my blog private, be a better mom and wife, friend, daughter, de-junk my house and give things away,go to the doctor and get well child checks, me a physical, dentist cleanings, and just have fun with my family....
well...things change right?
We put that all on hold until the beginning of January, and then we started to do things, by going to the dentist and doctor. The kids got shots, Hailey was brave at the dentist, 2 cavities and a baby root canal (?what the heck, I thought I was really good with her brushing, I felt sooo bad) Ryker didn't even let them in, the dentist looked at his smile, and said that he had good enamel. Ryker was really great with Hailey getting dental work, he held her hand and asked if she was okay. It was really cute, he worries soooo much about her.
We almost bought a house, and put it off for reasons that I did not know, it was kind of sad, I really liked it but it was not in the BEST location, and it DIDN'T have a YARD! We passed on it. Mike had put the starting of the business on hold to, for a reason I did not know.
I went to the doctor and got some SAD (but much needed) news....
Apparently I am ADDICTED to running....not in a good way. The doctor said that I am on the verge of an eating disorder. What? I had no clue that eating anything you want and exercising the extra calories was dangerous or naughty. I guess I have had this for awhile. I seriously had no clue. I was told to give my scale to Mike, read Intuitive Eating, only exercise for 5 days for an hour a day, and NOT count calories. I was put on restriction. The doctor asked if I was motivated to get up with my kids if they got up at 5:30 AM, and I said probably not, and then he asked if I would be motivated to go for a run at that time, wow, what an eye opener. When I was training for my marathon, I would not even be able to sleep knowing I was going to get a good run in, in the morning, I would be sooo excited to run, wow, I really needed a fix, didn't I? He then asked me "Why do you think I am doing this?" I said because you are mean, and then I cried. He said, no, I am doing this to save your life, to save your quality of life, and to make sure HAILEY does not do this. A couple of days into this Hailey wanted to weigh herself to see if she is big enough for a booster, and I said we don't have one, wow, the biggest melt down I have ever seen, I guess I need to look in the mirror, it would have been identical for sure.
I felt terrible for the first two weeks, not weighing myself, not running as much as I would like, transforming a two hour workout a day for 6 days, into 5 days for an hour, ONLY AN HOUR, people, I was going crazy. I cried, I was moody, I was sad, I seriously did not know what my purpose was anymore, worst of all, I didn't want to gain the weight back. I know this sounds soooo extreme, but I had to go through these feelings to realize I DO HAVE A PROBLEM.
So, now I run for 30 to 40 minutes, and stretch for 30 or 20 minutes, and I do a longer run on Saturdays. I take Fridays and Sundays, OFF, which is huge for me. If I don't get a workout in, it is missed, but I am okay with this now, that is sooo big for me. I might not fit into my clothes quite yet, but maybe I need new clothes, maybe I was not at my ideal weight. I am still trying to find out.
Then we went up to my mom's for a baptism of a relative. This also helped to regroup from all this weight stuff on a Saturday. We decided to look at some houses for fun, and we found the best house! It was perfect. It is on 1/3 of an acre, in a circle, and it has a rental. (Mikes dream) It is the center of the circle, so big yard (my dream). We thought about it for a long time. Then we found out there was an offer on it, what? we are going to lose this? I thought to myself, do you know how many houses you have looked at, and now you are going to lose this one? We have looked at soooo many nice ones, put offers on too many, and I am sooo sick of the process.
We went up the next weekend also and we looked at it again, I thought no this time, that it wasn't right, we looked at a few others, nothing seemed to be working. (I guess I didn't feel no, but Mike found some things wrong with it this time, and we were just confused, it was the devil, I just know it!) Mike read this, and he said, "I didn't know that you were feeling no at this time," and I really wasn't it was just confusing, and it was just an odd feeling to have.. It was sad, we felt so good about moving at this time in our lives. Anyway, we just didn't do anything. We spent all Saturday and Sunday thinking about it and finally....we became grown ups!
On Monday January 17 we put in an offer against the other offer, on the BEST house with the rental. On Wednesday the 19th they picked OURS!!!! We are moving!!!! Mike has always wanted a rental, and this house will just work out great. It is so close to my family, and closer to Mikes work. The kids will go to school with their cousins, and Hailey will ride a bus, that is her dream.
We will miss living with Grandpa, other relatives, and this ward, everything was so great. We have had a lot of service opportunities and we will miss everyone, we have made some "lifer" friends.
Soooo.......
In the midst of moving...I sliced my finger open, I was grabbing soap in the shower and grabbed my SHAVER, bled for two hours, another doctor visit. He super glued it. It is still healing and man it hurts real bad.
Kids got croup-out of commission for a whole week. I was so tired, and they were sooo sick. Two doctor visits, almost ER visit, for a chest x ray, thought Ryker was getting pneumonia. We decided to wait it out, and they are much better, after a priesthood blessing.
Last night I went in to check on them, and Ryker was no where to be found, I looked everywhere. Then I looked at Hailey, he was in her bed cuddling with her, it was sooo sweet. Then Hailey woke up and said, "What the heck, why is Jack on my freaking pillow!" It was still really sweet. Thank goodness for medicine and breathing treatments to heal these sweet little kids.
Ryker is going through identity crisis:
For a week he was Bumblebee, then Astro Boy and now Jack (from Hook). He makes everyone call him that, he WILL correct you. He says he is Jack who plays sports. He is so sweet and has quite the imagination. Hailey is getting better from her sickness, and she is getting so big. She is quite the helper, loves to clean and loves to help pack. She and Jack are in boosters now, and I just filled out Kindergarten papers, wow! We are excited for changes, and the new life that we will have.
I really feel that everything is for a reason, our new house doesn't have a lot of storage, but that is fine. I think that is why we lived in California, to realize that you don't NEED a lot of room. Happy/great people live in homes without storage, you just do it. We also made "lifer" friends in California, that we consider family. I think I needed to have this addiction, to realize I need to have motivation in my family life, and not just in myself, and improving me. With telling close friends and family a month ago, that I was going through this, amazingly, they already knew. I just needed to find out my own way, it was hard to tell people, I was so embarrassed and ashamed that I let it go sooo far, out of control. Some people were like, ya, hello, I have told you that, or I told you that 4 years ago. Others were surprised like me, and others probably are thinking twice that they have asked me to help train them, or coach them. I hope I can get my life in order, to one day help people and motivate them in the right way and teach them the right way of doing things.
I wanted to share a thought that I heard:
When a new baby comes to this world, they are perfect right, they just came from a very loving Heavenly Father, to everyone they are perfect, their parents, especially grandparents, I think we should let that stick and remember we are perfect to those people still. I know that I should be more gentle with myself.
A HUGE thanks to Mike and the kiddos for going through all these emotions and stages of addiction with me...I know I have been a beast. I sure LOVE you all.
Also, thanks to all the friends and family who support me, in all that I do, and still love me.
Sorry this was soooo long. Thanks for reading, and sharing good news with me.

Private!

2010-12-14T17:10:00.000-08:00

We have decided that we are going to go private. Let me know if you want to still view, if anyone is out there!
Thanks Jess and Mike

jumpin' the morning away!

2010-12-09T06:33:00.000-08:00

Today we went to Jump on It, the kids had a blast. I was having so much fun too, they have a mommy and me hour, on Wednesday and Friday, too fun. We do home preschool with them, and so I thought, field trip day! The kids had sooo much fun and were so tired after. Then we took it upon ourselves to go shopping and eat lunch with Grandma Nancy. We had a great day, we even watched some holiday movies.
I told Mike that I felt like a real mom today, I had a car and I took my kids places!!! I wish this teacher would have remembered her camera, a real teacher would have. I am still learning.

Today..well, yesterday!

2010-12-01T07:50:00.000-08:00

Today we played in the SNOW, we got all dressed up, that alone took ten minutes. Then we went out and played in the snow, went for a walk, and played with some friends. We were on our way home, and we all had a snow ball fight. Rykers' laugh was too cute, and loud, and Haileys' evil laugh, well, it said "watch out". It was a lot of fun, and we should do it every day. Ryker took a nap today, the snow wore him out. He fell down in the snow twice, and it reminded me of "Ralphie on the Christmas Story", it took him a while to figure out how to roll over to get up. I tried to help him, but he didn't want me to. It all ended when Hailey hit Ryker with a snow ball, and it went down his shirt, I don't blame him for crying, really loud.
The kids and I both slept really good, and even slept in!!
I love my kids, and I love my treadmill. I run sooo much and love it, every minute. Speaking of that, no half marathons or marathons this year for me. That is a whole other story, but NEXT year for sure. I am sad about this, I will just have to do 10ks and 5ks. I have picked up kick boxing, wow, that is an amazing workout.
My friend that we visited said, do you have a car yet? I told her that Mike was still fixing the one we bought, and she said that her and her husband were talking about me, and they said that I needed to put chains on my stroller!!! Too funny, but oh, too true.

Wow, time really does fly!

2010-11-29T08:50:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe it is already December, and really winter. So much has happened that I will only do a quick update.
I know it is not even close to September, but Hailey turned 5, and we had a few fun parties for her. She planned them. We had a family party a week before her real birthday at our house, we ate pizza and then we were off to Liberty Land. That was a lot of fun. She was really cute, and we had a blast. Many family members were able to come, it was the best. Then for her real birthday, we had 33 (not kidding) kids in our front yard, (yes, the whole primary) playing in the blow up pool, slip n sliding, ring tossing, bean bag throwing, going crazy for two hours. Then we had a pinata and some ice cream cake I had made. I think it turned out great, Hailey was sooooo happy, and thrilled. Some parents stayed to help me, that was really sweet of them. We all slept really good that night! I love her and all of her crazy energy, she makes me laugh, smile, and cry daily. I can't believe she is 5.
In October, I turned 29. I took the kids on a run to some stores, and then we went to the park and played with some cousins, it was such a beautiful day! I was surprised by a dinner made for me, the kids and Mike made me waffles, grilled toast, and strawberries, and chocolate milk. It was yummy. Then Mike surprised me and took me to the mall, he hates the mall. We went and got some quotes on some jewelery, yes, to size my ring! Then we went to Iceberg and got a free birthday shake, did you know they do them? It was a fantastic day.
For Halloween we dressed up! Hailey was a cheerleader, Ryker was a fireman, I was a french maid, and Mike was a coroner. We had a few fun parties, and ate some fun food, and got to see some great friends, that we feel are family. We also got some candy and some VERY unnecessary calories and energy.
November came, and went too fast. Ryker is now 3. He says he doesn't like to be three, he wants to be two. We threw him a family hockey party. We had it over at the church and had a blast. We had a potato bar, and won ton salad, ding dong cake,ice cream and fudge, and lots of toppings. We had the kids play hockey with their sticks, and made them hockey jerseys. We spent a lot of time making jerseys and the goals, and getting 12 hockey sticks. We had a cool party. Ryker was sooooo thrilled with this. He still has to wear his jersey everyday, and he plays hockey with the nets in the house daily. He is a really nice little boy, and I am so grateful for him. I was sad that night, because I realized I don't have babies anymore, not even really toddlers, I have KIDS!!! I love them both and would not change a thing.
For Thanksgiving, we spent it with my family. I was going to run a 5k with my sisters as Indians but it got canceled due to freezing temperatures. I ran 3.1 miles anyway, on my treadmill before we left, I wanted to feel good about eating all the yummy food. Being with family was soooo fun, I got to help with the dinner, and getting everything ready. The kids made name tags for everyone, and they put them on the chairs. I really loved the day. We then made some Indian apparel, and gladly wore it. We then went over to the park by my moms house and played dodge ball, stuck in the mud (snow), and we went on the swings. We did this all with our winter woolies on, it had snowed and was soooo cold. We had a blast, and then when we were all frozen we headed back and had hot chocolate. It was a great day. I love the holidays when we can just relax and talk and not be stressed about anything.
Now, we have sooo much snow, I don't even want to go outside. It is bitter cold, and I don't like it. I love how it looks, and I love to play in it, but not drive in it, and not run in it. Good thing for me, I don't have a car, and I have a treadmill.
What do you do during the day to get your kids energy out, when it is too cold to go outside?

A very, very long over due post!!!

2010-09-26T19:11:00.000-07:00

Long, over due, updates, on marathon, and reunions, and some other stuff.

Ryker and his sport of the week. We were at a family reunion, and he decided he loves golf, well, that lasted awhile. Then baseball hit, and now it is back to hockey. I secretly love hockey and the fights, the checking, the naughty boxes, but do I want Ryker to play? Well, that might be another story. Ryker said "Mom, I will be safe, it is not dangerous."

This sign made me laugh so hard, and it is so true. My husband has been my rock, and I love him so much. He has supported me in so many ways. All I can say is, ready to start training again? Thanks for everything Mike. It is not easy being married to an insane exerciser, so I have heard.

This is at my high school reunion, with my high school bestie, Annie Barney. It was fun to see everyone, but kinda weird at the same time too. I mean they were doing things, (drinking and other stuff) that was illegal last time I saw them, a part of me wanted to call the cops on them, then I remembered we are all 28, or 29! Mike was a trooper and came and stayed as long as I wanted to.

Hailey after her race, wow, she did sooo good. She ran a mile in 12 minutes and 20 seconds or something close to that. I need to be better about posting things with a fresh memory.

Me and Hailey after our races! I hope we can have the opportunity to do a lot more of these together!

My very own fan club. What awesome friends to come all the way to see a slow poke like me. It was sooo much fun having you there, thanks for coming.

This is my LITTLE sister Jodie. She is sooo funny. She plays basketball at Weber State and is in the best shape, and she could not understand why I would do something like this....no one does, unless they do it!
I loved her sign though.

This is the picture of the 91 buses lining up at 4:15 in the morning to take us crazies up the canyon.

And this is Hailey getting her kit the day before, I was so proud of her. I may have cried getting our kits, but no one saw, I hope.
I cannot believe I actually did this thing called a marathon, and that I am alive to talk about it. I want to do many more, but we will see. I am looking forward to 10/01/10, that is the day that registration begins for this again. This time, I will do it for different reasons, to beat my time, to let myself know that I am NOT a one hit wonder, and to prove that I CAN!!!

Weight check:
I was completely naughty again, and gained all the weight back a few weeks ago. But since I like to think of myself as a hard core person, I am back down to 138, and feeling okay. My goal is to be a 135 by Halloween. Can I do it? I will let you know. But I will say that I love the way my pants are fitting, good thing because it is cold here!!!

As I promised....sorry, so late:(

2010-08-05T12:53:00.000-07:00

Well we have been busy...to say the least.
We went on a family vacation to a family reunion. All 65 of us had a great time, but wish everyone would have been able to come. We missed those who were not there. We have done fireworks, which the kiddos loved. We have had many late nights, laughing and then the kids crying because they are too tired to have stayed up laughing. (I hope that makes sense.) We have cleaned houses, and helped many people move to there new homes, it gives me hope, kind of...I would like that someday as well.
I have lost weight!!!! I have exercised soooo much and really watched my calorie intake, and read the labels, stopped eating after seven and guess what? The old fashioned way really works!!! I am really proud of myself, this has been sooo hard for me, but I feel great, hopefully it shows.
I now weigh 137, now this is not huge, considering it has been two weeks, but that is huge to me, and now I can wear my pants and feel good about them.
I will update soon, I hope, this summer stuff gets really nuts, super fast.

FINAL THOUGHT: (Is that Jerry Springer or what? Not saying I watched the show at all during high school.)

I have a high school reunion this weekend, that's right out of high school now for ten years. I am nervous, scared, frightened, and kind of confused if I should go or not. What are your thoughts about high school reunions? Just saying....

some funny stuff....and some serious stuff.....

2010-07-13T11:33:00.000-07:00

Ryker:
We were at church, during the last song we see that Ryker is drawing on himself with a black marker, we take the black marker away, he had it all over his face, and said really loud, "I wanna be black!"
(I have been debating whether to post that comment or not, so if it offends people, sorry.) We did not know what to say or do. I wanted to laugh, but kept it inside. I looked at Mike and gave him the look, he is yours.
What would you have done?

Today we were going to go to the pool, and they would not stop playing to eat, and would not listen, and so I told them we weren't going.....

Hailey says:
"When my kids want to go somewhere I will just take them, because that is what a good mom does."
"The summer is almost over, and the pool is only open in the summer, waaaaaaaaa," fake crying, awesome.

We sold our VAN!!!! waaaaaahhhhhoooooooo
Reasons:
too big
couldn't park the thing and feel good about it
too big
I just never fell in love with it

So, we are a one car family right now. We really "run" errands, and I secretly love it. We save a ton of money because I don't really shop (i.e. Costco, without a car, a double jogger is big, but not costco big)
We have had lots of fun this summer:
pools
partying
eating and over eating
fireworks
camping trips
family get togethers
slip n slide fun
running
parades
car shows
and much much more!!!

This is the more serious paragraphs:

Let's discuss some of MY weight issues for a minute. I gained about 10-12 pounds marathon training. People have said don't worry it's muscle. Well, I worry, my pants don't fit as loose as they should, a little bit of WIGGLE is fine, but when you have to WALK into your jeans, wow, it really hits you, just saying. My thighs are huge, and my calves are huge(r). I have to pri on in the morning and pri off at night. Seriously?
I have started a new take on food, I want to hate it. I want to know why I eat, when I eat, and know when to stop eating. I am 141 as of this morning, for some people reading this, remember the 118 girl? ya, the 141 girl ate her! Mike says that I look healthier, which is nice, but, that brings me to my next point, it doesn't matter what people say about you...it matters what you think about yourself. I don't want to buy new pants, I want to be a size 6 forever, but is this unrealistic thinking? I have heard so much lately that it is not about the size or the number you are it is how you FEEL, but, I just am having a hard time with this.
I FEEL that I am healthy, and exercise like a mad woman, but yet cannot "shake" the extra poundage....what is wrong with me?
I run, do pilates, and do a lot more, and have started to eat a lot less. I have seen some results, but really. What is going on?
Chanda I need you right now...any advice, how do you get rid of muscle? Do I even want to, should I just get used to the size eight my thighs are and buy pants to fit them, but not fit my waist, a little help please.
I am going to post my weight every week, I am serious, I want to change my life, not my clothes. I am doing this to model good healthy lifestyle for my kids, and not week on week off, oh, cupcakes one week, don't touch them the next. Mike says moderation in all things, but once I taste it, oh, better believe I WANT MORE!!!
I will post pictures soon, I promise, we have been busy with life, well, you too probably.

Sunscreen, Summer, Potty Training!

2010-06-10T06:26:00.000-07:00

This won't be long.
I have not been so good lately at the whole blogging world, where's the marathon pictures right? They are still coming...we have been so busy OUTSIDE, doing anything and everything. Hailey loves to go bike riding, and playing with anyone who will and can play, Ryker loves anything that is outside, water, bugs, digging, any sports, and where am I? OUTSIDE, doing yardwork, and applying sunscreen, and making them take potty breaks and drink breaks. Ryker is potty trained now, still some accidents when he gets scared or something, he has the whole "this is a different potty" anxiety going on....so I bought a portable seat that can go on any potty for Hailey and we use it for him as well. Ryker discovered he can squirt last night, so, I am NOT going to be carrying around a stool for when we are other places...I am a little worried about this one.
Hailey and Ryker are doing so great. I have kids who are starting to LISTEN to me, who we can go to the MOVIES with, and who EAT, and the SLEEP thru the night now...oh, it is starting to be fun and comfortable! It's always been fun, don't get me wrong, but it was always fun-stressful.
I labeled this sunscreen because I want your opinion:
Do you put it on to NOT get skin cancer Or do you apply it because sun burns hurt and you don't want your kids to be in pain?
I was thinking a lot about this, and I don't want my kids to be mad at me that they have skin spots that are cancer, and I don't want them to hurt, so it is a win win situation. Now if I can remember to do it everytime!!
I love summer, I love sunscreen, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE not buying or changing any diapers.

No words, just Tears!

2010-05-17T08:36:00.000-07:00

Well, Marathon day came and went....a lot of emotion!!
My mom came with me to get my running kit the day before the race, and she started crying and said, "I am so proud of you, I want to do one too!" We picked up Hailey and Emilys kit too, so cute. The kids k was the best part, so many kids so much energy.
Mike put KT tape on my IT Band injury. I tried to go to sleep, to be honest, this was the moment I had been waiting for since November. 716 miles in training later, poof, it is here.
Am I ready? Will I get removed from the race because I don't look healthy enough to finish? Will I make it to mile 17 before 11:30 before they start removing people to get the canyon open again? Can I do this?
I woke up from a very restless night at 3:30 AM. I ate a banana and a half of bagel and went to the bathroom so many times, which was a blessing, and tried to drink so much, to hydrate myself before I dehydrate myself later on that morning. I was getting dressed and to my surprise Hailey was up too, she got up to get her kit ready and catch her bus up the canyon...what? Hailey was so sad that they weren't busing the kids up the canyon too. She and Mike took me to the bus loading spot at 4:30 AM. We said goodbye, and he said see you at the finish! Tears came, didn't fall. So many runners, 5000 to be exact, and 97buses, so motivational and emotional. We had all worked for the same goal, many for different reasons, but we were all hoping to do something special that day.
I was on bus 2, and we headed up the dark canyon. I talked with a nice girl about all our nerves, and we had a few laughs, and talked about our kids and husbands, the band of support behind us. While talking I ate a half of a bagel.
We got up the canyon at 5:30 AM, I looked out the windows, and bonfires everywhere, and pottys. I was so excited to be there, and feel so alive. I had been debating all night and all morning what to run in, I ended up taking off my long sleeve, and the tights. I ran in shorts, two tanks, and a jacket to begin with. The sun came up, and it was light and so beautiful. It was so amazing to be with so many people who share the same crazy dream.
Well, 6:50 came and we lined up by by our pacer flags. I got right next to ten and felt good about that. I ran with the same girl for about the first four miles, and that was great. We ran passed this cute couple blasting from their car "Hear comes the Sun", the were holding hands and waving. So cute, tears came, I held them back again. Trista the girl I was running with stopped to take off some of her clothes and told me to go on. I did, and soon found a cute couple running together with her husband coaching her, I said "good advice, I am going to keep up with you," and then they stopped to go to the bathroom. I kept going. I kept my eye on one girl that I wanted to get up with. I did and I ran with Harmoni for the next twelve miles. We could not believe we were out doing this, and how fast it went. I quickly learned her story, she was running it for her mom who had polio as a child and now cannot walk. She was so nice. We found more people to run with and all of a sudden we had a team. I ran with Jeff who was older and had ran about 100 marathons, but this was his first in 30 years. We found Jen, and Raelyn, and we motivated each other, talked to each other, made each other laugh, and coached each other. I felt so great at mile 20, I left my team. Was that mean?
I ran down the canyon passing people, and feeling so great. At mile 23, I thought to myself, I got this. Then the crowd began, it was so emotional for strangers cheering and they don't even know you, just supporting you on the biggest day. I cried and the crowd said good job, and I said you are making me cry. I got to mile 24 and this was the hardest for me. I ran through though and had a great time. I saw mile 26 mile marker and decided to walk a block so I could finish strong. I finished with Sarah and Annie yelling my name. It was an out of body moment, I really didn't know what to feel. I just wanted to see my family who helped me train so good. They called Sarah and quickly made their way through the crowds, and we hugged. Then we had to go over and watch Hailey and Emily run her race. Hailey did so good, she ran the mile in 12 min and 30 sec. Emily ran it in 10 min and 15 sec. I ran the marathon 26.2 miles in 5 hours and 4 min. I was sore and tight.
We went to El Matador as a runner family, and had a great meal. I went home and stretched and took a bath. I iced and stretched the rest of the day. We had a family BBQ that night, it was so much fun to talk and relax with all of my family.
They all were talking about running the marathon relay! Did they catch the runner bug?
I had the best experience, awesome weather, beautiful mountains, and no wild life, no pain until mile 21, I started feeling it.
Will I do it again? I am not sure, but it was the best feeling ever, and I would love to feel that again.
Thanks for all the texts, phone calls, and coming up to watch me. It was such a special day for me, and I believe you all had a big part in it.
Thanks to you, I am a marathoner!!!!
Pictures to come, I promise. I just don't know how to do them.

Tonsils!!

2010-04-25T19:21:00.000-07:00

Well, it has been yet another busy week around here. Ryker got his tonsils out on Tuesday, they did a great job. They showed us his tonsils, man they were huge. The doctor said you think these are huge, you should have seen the adenoids. We stayed at the clinic to have them keep an eye on Ryker for a few hours. We came home, and he ate bread sticks, pudding, Popsicles, and lots of drinks. Then Mike and Hailey left to go and look at bikes, and that's when everything happened......
Ryker took a drink and had a little bite of bread stick, I was going to put him down for a nap, well, he wanted to take a nap out in the front room watching Hockey, and began to throw a fit, so I let him settle down, but he wasn't settling down, he was turning gray-blue, and his eyes were rolling back in his head, and his arms were stiff as well as his neck. I rushed outside, holding Ryker and freaking out, to see if Mike was still here, because he was the one who always has saved Ryker in the past. He was gone, and so was my baby. I was holding him, screaming, please help me, somebody help me, please, trying to save Ryker, by putting him over my knee, and hoping to hear him cry, breath, gasp something. Grandpa came out, and got me inside, asked if he was breathing, and I said No,we put him over the couch end and finally Ryker was back with us crying. I was so frightened. Many neighbors came to see what the crazy woman screaming was all about, and they were pleased to know that everything was okay. I thought he had choked on his bread stick bite. I called Mike and told him what had happened. He asked if he needed to rush home, I wanted him too, but I said no. I knew it was important to Hailey to be with Daddy.
Well I got him down for a nap watching Hockey, and then he woke up. Mike was home and so was Hailey at this point. Some friends were over so Ryker and I went outside to say hello. Hailey wanted her plasma bike, so I went and got it out for her, and that is when it happened again, Ryker was throwing a fit, and I handed him to Mike. Well Mike was like, where's his eyes, he turned blue and gray again, then he came back, I was in panic and then he did it again. So this was the third time, this time no food in his mouth. We called the clinic, Heidi who was over took Hailey and bathed her, and made her feel safe. We continued to put drinks and pudding down Ryker. Then I went and got Hailey, who really wanted to stay with fun Heidi.(thank you so much)
We contacted the doctor and he said to bring him back up to the clinic to test oxygen levels. The nurse said to eat if everything seemed okay. So we ate, well, I shoveled food in my mouth and Haileys' and was ready to roll out. Mike was not quite done, and our other neighbor came over with her oxygen machine and tested Ryker for us. His numbers were perfect. We said goodbye to them and then it happened again. Ryker went in the other room to find goggles, and got frustrated, and was laying on the ground gasping for air and crying. We thought did he just do it again? We rushed over to the neighbors with the machine, and got another reading, still great numbers...what the heck?
I rushed in like mamma bear, and ordered we go now, that this is not normal and it is not okay.
We went up, they monitored and everything was fine, Ryker ate a few more Popsicles, and was told we could stay the night for free. They told me he was holding his breath to the point of passing out...and if he does it again, just blow air into his mouth...oh, is that all? That is so much easier said than done, I was so stressed out, and scared. They related him to a computer, that when the computer shuts down it needs to rebut, and they said he can't hold his breath for very long. I was like can he die, and they said, I can't say no, but it is unlikely. I asked the nurse what she would do if this was her child, and she said I would take him home and sleep by him.
We thought about it and we decided to come home and give him a blessing. I slept by him, and he did great. He needed medicine, and I was there to give it to him, along with drinks.
The next days have all been a blur....very moody Ryker, who doesn't want to eat or drink, we have to take hockey time outs to drink.....sleep deprived, moody Mike, sleep deprived, moody and stressed out me....and Hailey just wants to play with everyone on our block!
I hope this is on the mends. These days have been some hard ones, but we are so grateful that our Ryker is here with us. I told him, that it is not his time to go. We have not had any episodes since, and we are glad. No more snoring, sleep apnea, and he does not breath like Darth Vader. It is weird not to hear him, and knowing that it is all because of the lack of tonsils.
Running update:
I ran 12 on Saturday and biked 6. Hopefully this is okay. A little bit of cross training never hurts right? I had the worst running day of my life, seriously, Mike had to come get me after 6, and I did 6 at home. Really? I was so mad at myself, actually very angry. My body won that fight, I just kept thinking you can do this, you need to do this, and I just couldn't....failure, in my mind, failure.
Tomorrow we will post pictures of Ryker and Hailey. Ryker has taken Haileys' baby crib, and flipped it on its' side and shoots balls in it, it is his Hockey net! What a smart little boy, and he is good with his aim. Hailey got a new bike, with training wheels, and she loves it. My kids are growing up, and I absolutely love them. They are so nice and funny. I am so grateful that I am their mommy.

Well, this just might be the "IT" factor!

2010-04-17T20:48:00.000-07:00

We have been playing dodge ball, lately, but more with people really. Ryker is getting his tonsils out next week and he cannot be sick, or they won't take them out. So, if you had a party this weekend, which there were three killer ones, we could not attend. I am sorry. Hailey really wanted to play with her friends today, and asked if we were still playing the game, which I replied to with a BIG YES!!!
We de-cluttered our kids' room and started on the rest of the house. Oh, what a nice feeling, to give to others and have so much more room, and to have the toys GONE, that aren't touched unless the neighbors are around, uggggh, then comes the Lysol, I HATE germs, repeat, HATE them!
We also had a car cleaning party, and a dandelion up-rooting party. Ryker loved to help find the yellow flowers, and Hailey loved picking them. No one has taught her that they can put yellow on your skin, yet!
Then it was off for my 19 mile run.
I need to back up to last week, and give you some updates. Well, last week was my 18 mile run, and I just thought well, why not 20? I need to do it for sure, and with Ryker getting surgery, who knows what that week will bring, right? So I did it. I upped my mileage from 17 to 20, is this stupid, YES!!! It took me four hours, exactly. I started hurting really bad at mile 17, and I thought you just need to pull yourself together and finish! I did, and I could hardly walk. I hurt my IT Bands. Monday brought doctor visits, and Styrofoam roller, that I have to lay on and roll for 15 minutes twice a day. He said that I could still run, and I do my rolling faithfully to insure that. I am so thrilled that I can still train.
So, back to today. I was going to run to the provo temple, and home again to roll, and then head out again....
Nope, I ran to the provo temple, and just kept on going...right up to the mountain road, down foothill, (where I met a gardner, we talked weeds and trails for a minute, and she gave me water, what a nice lady,) okay back to the run, to the Riverwoods, and then to the canyon for a couple of miles, refilled my two waters, then turned around and came home on state street!
Mike and the kids met me at the last half mile, it was so good to see them, and they finished the run, the 21 mile run with me. I finished at 4:45, and I left at 1:05. Now that is amazing for me, three hours and 40 minutes!!!
OH WHAT A FEELING 21 MILES CAN BE, this is MY IT!!!!
My knee, thigh, and hips are tight tonight, but other than that....I feel so great. I was telling my mom that "it feels so good to know that you have that kind of stuff in you, and the endurance." These are the kind of runs, that leave me feeling, hey, "maybe I will be able to do this marathon stuff..."
I will keep you posted on post surgery...please keep him in your prayers, I am so worried about him, and his big tonsil removal.
Thanks.

I wish I had proof!

2010-03-29T08:23:00.000-07:00

This weekend was supposed to be another 16 mile run. I was thrilled to do this again, and this time was going to go with a running club. They told me at the running store that someone would do 16 miles....well, they didn't want to and some of them didn't have the time. We ran on two different trails, and one was on a couple of mountain sides, I would have normally hiked these mountains and looked at the beautiful views and would have been satisfied, but no, we ran and ran, through switchbacks, big vertical trails, and I ran, sometimes feeling no movement, but I was running. I have never done trails before, and they are nothing to take too lightly. I never would have done this on my own, I was so proud of myself.
We did nine miles in the mountains, and a new running friend and I did 4 more on the river trail. My goodness, the views of this run were AMAZING!!! I am trying to tell myself, the 13 miles, including HILLS that I would have not got in on my 16 mile run, compensated the run I was going to do. But, you know me, I added 3 miles to my various runs this week. Instead of two today, I ran three.
My new friend Malana called me a hard core runner....I don't call myself that nor do I think I am. I just enjoy doing something I never thought I would do, or be part of. This is great, I love running, and the self motivation you develop from it. This is the hardest thing I have ever done, but I am doing it.
I also was looking at my schedule and April 20, Ryker is getting his tonsils out, ya, April 24, my longest run EVER, so far, 20 miles.
What have I done to myself?
Thanks to my family for getting better, and being a big support to me. I know that you are all behind me. Also, thanks to my friends who support me as well, I hope you feel my support in your lives as well.

Sick, moody, and just plain nasty!

2010-03-26T07:03:00.000-07:00

This is what we have been busy with, hence, no blog time....
Mike had not been feeling the best for a long time, and we were exposed to Strep Throat the week before.
Hailey came down with pink eye on Tuesday the 16, and her and Mike were seen by the doctor. Hailey got some drops, while Mike got an antibiotic called in, just in case it got worse. Haileys' eyes were nasty and closing more and more each second, it seemed like that anyway.
Ryker started coughing the next night, and all of you know by now, that when Ryker gets sick, he's bad. He also got pink eye in one of his eyes, not too bad though, we caught it.
Mike went and filled his amoxicillion and he was not happy it was that, he needs the big augmentan to get feeling better.
So, on Monday, no relief from Ryker, actually he was getting worse, I took him in to the doctor, and he had Bronchitis, and I had the doctor give me his opinion about the whole tonsil issue. We are getting them out, April 20, 2010.
They both got pink eye, or at least a little bit of it, so we did drops again, the doctor gave us ten refills.
I also had the doctor call in a new prescription for Mike, this time augmentan.
All this time I have been doing laundry, laundry, cleaning, cooking every meal, doing the dishes, disinfecting, and washing everything, lysoling everything, and more laundry.
I cannot tell you how many loads of sheets I have done.
Hailey is doing better, actually a lot better, coughs at night a little, but all in all she is great. No goopy eyes.
Ryker is doing much better, last day of azithrimycin today. No more goopy eyes, but still coughs every now and then.
Mike, after staying home two days, he went back to work on Thursday, and is there again today. Mike has thought that he ended up with the flu, he had bad body aches, was so moody, fever, sore throat, and chills. He is still on the beloved augmentan.
I have had a sore throat since Sunday, but that is my only thing, I am doing good.
If a mom gets sick who takes care of her?

15 miles....check!

2010-03-12T21:59:00.000-08:00

So today, I was feeling a lot of nervousness for tomorrow and the long run....I seriously was so frustrated last week that I kept questioning my training. Do I really have it in me? Do I have the right training program? Did I pick something too hard to face? Am I strong enough, mentally and physically? Seriously, all day....what a motivation, huh?
So we went through Friday like non other..."cleaning Friday" is now what Hailey calls it, and that is just what it is. I normally take a running break today, and just clean, cook, and get ready for the weekend.
Well, we took naps today, everyday this week, HOORAY for naps. I have always loved my sleep. Anyway, we all woke up, made dinner, and ate Manicotti, I needed to carb load for tomorrows run, right?
I asked Mike when it would work out to run this weekend, we checked the weather, tomorrow 50% chance rain, or snow, and tonights' weather was perfect...so we decided to do the run tonight. I got all ready, kissed everyone goodbye, and left at 6:10.
I was making every light.
I kept my pace up.
I made it to places in record time.
I was running with my shadow...have you ever noticed where your shadow is and what it is doing. Well, sometimes it was to the side of me like my friend, sometimes in front of me like a bad friend, and sometimes there were two in back of me, pushing me along.
I really felt my Grandpa Pete tonight on the run, maybe, just maybe he was one of those shadows...it felt like it.
I also felt Mikes' brother Jason, and his Grandma Palmer. I was running pass the cemetery where they are both buried, and I was overwhelmed with thoughts of them.
This was the best run!
I was not afraid for my life, I never wanted to stop, I didn't hurt, and I didn't once think, "I can't finish!"
I finished and in great time. I returned home at 8: 44, stretched, and was talking to Mike, and we thought it was a little short of 15 miles, so I got back out there and ran around my neighborhood, which is exactly a mile.
I returned home at 9:00.
I was, well am, full of energy, and confidence, this run is so what I needed.
Thank you for all of your love, support, and nice words, even if you don't like running.
Tonight I did something I have NEVER done, and I NEVER thought I would do. I hope I don't get prideful, everyone knows what comes next. I have already been down, I just want to enjoy it for a little while. (Almost 2 months to be exact!)
What's in your future? Tell me.

Just a few things

2010-03-08T07:55:00.000-08:00

Last night Ryker slept with shoes on....he won't take them off....at least they were boy shoes, not sparkly or tap, he is soooo cute. He took a nap with them on, without pants on, and "underwears" on over his diaper. I should have seen this shoe thing coming, every night after bath time, he puts his shoes on without his socks, makes me cringe, stinky feet waiting to happen.
Also, last night, Hailey decided she wanted to switch Ryker blankets. She took Rykers "lacey", when he was born, a blue blanket that my aunt made for him, she was nice enough to give Ryker her white TWO year old one, for a NEW blue one. Blue is her favorite color so we thought Ryker is so young and won't even know that the blue one was really his. Well, last night she decided she wants the white one back, and Ryker is pretty attached to the white one now...we made the switch, we will see how long Ryker goes with it.
I bet you are wondering about the whole nap thing, I made them take naps yesterday, I was so tired and so was Mike, and we ALL enjoyed a long nap....maybe we can fix this whole lack of nap thing...maybe.
I was still freaking out inside wondering if I was really registered for the ogden marathon...well I might have been not the only one, I was on the website today getting really excited, and I see a link VERIFY REGISTRATION, and thought wow, okay, so I did, and Hailey and myself are both registered...I was hoping because it was a lot of money, and I really was hoping I was training for something.

Something new for all.....

2010-03-07T18:54:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was the longest run that I have EVER done, I ran 14 miles, it was so hard for me.
I find it so hard to keep motivated to keeping pace, and to not think of pain, when I am outside....when I am on my treadmill, I just do it. I actually go faster because I want get done, and I want to relieve Mike from babysitting the kids. I also find it hard to stop at every light, I must have timed it horrible this run, just in time to stop at every stinkin' light. Yesterday was hard. I left at 8:05 and returned at 11:15, that sucks, if you think oh my, three hours and that is all she ran....I do too....BUT, I try to tell myself that stopping at lights, stopping to walk to relieve some pain, stopping in the middle to stretch, eat gummy gels, and to drink water, all played a part, but still, that time is rough.
I hope that when I run the marathon that I will keep my eye on someone, and try to keep up with them. I need to do better though....I need to do more tempo runs, eat better, and try to keep my pace up.
I was so glad to come home, and say to myself, today you did something you have never done, and you did it alone, with a lot of prayers, and you did it with some pain, but you did it. I prayed so hard to keep my spirits up, don't get me wrong, I absolutely love running, but if you know me, I never stop running to walk, and today I did, I never hurt, and today I did, I never think of going home, or calling Mike to come and get me, and today I thought about it. This is THE hardest thing that I have ever done mentally, physically, and spiritually, but yet I love it, and want to achieve my goal...as weird as that sounds. I would say that it is as hard as giving birth, but you get pain relievers for that, and they give you more if you ask, and if you are crying, but with this, if you are crying at mile 1, you still have 25.2 miles to go, no medication this time....but a lot of gratitude, and tears.
I guess this is a lot like life, keeping our focus on our Heavenly Father, and not letting anything get in the way....keeping our eyes on Him will help us in all that we do.
I know that I can do hard things, and I will finish my marathon, maybe not in pace time, but I will finish, have that satisfaction knowing that I just did the hardest thing that I chose to do, so I can do the hard things I don't choose.
Life is busy, but good. The kids are hilarious, and very active. They don't take naps anymore, SAD day...what do you do all day with your kids...I needed the nap hours to think of more to do.
Mike is working hard, and looking forward to riding the motorcycle.
I started a quilt with my mother in law, and this is a new thing for me, so, very challenging. The goal is to make a twin comforter for Hailey and Ryker, for Christmas, hopefully this next Christmas....keeping fingers crossed. My mother in law is very patient with me and she is a great quilter, I am lucky to have her help me, thank you Nancy, the kids will be so grateful.
So why did I label this blog the way I did?
New for mike: babysitting kids all day on saturday, he went to bed at 8:30, hmmmmm, maybe he knows why I am so tired....we'll see.
kiddos: having only mike on saturday....I felt so bad.
Me: guilt....of not being there for my kids on saturday, always have guilt....any moms' out there have that...you need a break but then feel terrible for taking one? This feeling is not new, but I have never talked about this before, and today I felt bad.
14 miles!!!!
sewing a quilt
Sorry this was soooo long...next post....not about running....not keeping any promises though! That is my life right now, and I happy to be in it.

13 miles, to a temple!!!

2010-02-23T07:44:00.000-08:00

On Saturday, this post is late, I ran 13 miles to the Mount Timp Temple!!!(I ran to provo temple, when it was my 9 mile week..) I started at my house, and ended at the temple, and then ran to mikes moms house. It was so amazing, and so beautiful. I was surprised when I saw mike and the kids at the end of the viaduct, it was like it really was a half marathon. I made good time considering I had to stop at half of the stop lights, and I stopped to talk to mike and the kids, but I wish I would have done better, maybe next week. I will do the same miles next week. I want to get comfortable with a half marathon.
Three months in view:
Feb. 27: 13 miles
March 6: 14 miles
March 13: 15 miles
March 20: 16 miles
March 27: 16 miles
April 3: 17 miles
April 10: 18 miles
April 17: 19 miles
April 24: 20 miles
May 1: 12 miles
May 8: 7 miles
May 15, marathon!!! 26.2 miles.

I know that I have a lot of long runs ahead, but I want to get comfortable on my feet, and be prepared. I am so excited to do this, and to take you along with me. I always worry, am I really signed up for this, or will I be in shock when I show up on May 15, and they don't have me on the list...my dreams would be shattered.
I am feeling great, a little sore, but nothing too bad.
I am still eating like crazy, I really need to stop, and watch it.
I am trying to manage a house, kids, runs, and cooking, I am busy, and tired.

milk?

2010-02-17T16:26:00.000-08:00

I was informed tonight at dinner, while drinking milk, that this is not socially acceptable....so I ask....
What do you all drink at lunch and dinner?

A lot of things!

2010-02-14T16:50:00.000-08:00

This week has gone by so quickly:
We have done so much, and yet it doesn't feel like it. We have all had a cold, and mine and Rykers was not going away. So I took the kids to the doctor and had me and Boba (Ryker) checked out. We both had "gunk" that was not leaving us. So, we both got fun medicine to take, and hopefully get over this stuff. Ryker got on a breathing treatment again, I hope we are over this soon.
We also made valentine cookies, and took them EVERYWHERE!!! Hailey had two valentine parties, one of which Ryker and I went. Holidays are so much fun with kids. Ryker has dressed himself lately, he was wearing his swimsuit over his pants, and had goggles on, the safety ones that come with the cute real looking tools....bright orange....yep, he belongs to me. All weekend long, even to church. I remember the advice pick your battles?

We also tried to get all the valentines done, and we did it, they are all done, and given to the right person, hopefully.
Yesterday I ran 12 miles, my doctor said because of my sinus infection, I should run inside....so I did it all on the treadmill.....yes you read right...on the treadmill. I was focused, I ran 6 miles, took a break to stretch, eat a power bar...(I am experimenting on what I like to eat, power bars not my favorite, I like the gummy gels the best), I took a long drink, and went to the bathroom, for those of you who run, you know why!
Then I started again, 7 miles came, and Hailey was running around the house "I'm going to get your gina",what? did I hear that right? well, Mike was laughing, so I stopped for a minute to put her in time out and explain why we don't say that kind of stuff(wow)...fixed my shoe(it was rubbing on my middle foot) put Vaseline on it and got back on.
I never slowed down, I paced myself at a 9.30 mile, and at the end I was running a 9.15, to finish it off. I was soooooo proud of myself. I have told myself in the past that when I get up around 7 or 8 miles, I tend to add 30 seconds, well, I cannot tell myself that anymore, this time I took away 30 seconds. I ran 12 miles in 117 minutes, and finished 12.25 in 120 minutes. (That is a little under 2 hours!!!!) I know this is nuts, but I am so proud of this. I can't wait to run outside again, and see how far it actually is.
Happy Valentines Day to everyone, hope it was magical!!!

Eleven miles...and more to go!?!

2010-02-07T14:02:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was my 11 mile mark...wow, to think last time I was training for a run, I was training with three other amazing women and this was our longest run. Now, I am training alone, and this is not the end, only the beginning, really. I am kind of worried about getting up there in miles, and being able to hold my body up and keep my energy up. I am doing push ups and doing pilates to cross train, but I need to lose some extra pounds...to really let my body conquer this silly goal of mine. The problem, running makes you soooo hungry, and I LOVE to eat...but, is it really worth it, or is training up to 20 miles a better feeling, than to just feel full for awhile. I was thinking a couple of days ago, why do I eat? My answers are different than that of 7 years ago, I eat to fuel my body, and to comfort,sometimes, which is what it always used to be. I need to get to the point where I eat to live, not live to eat, there is a difference.
I think the devil created all the yummy food in this world....I just can't stop sometimes.
Yesterday I was running in a drizzle of rain, on a road without sidewalks, livestock, skunks dead and alive, birds that did not fly south, pebbles in my shoes that hurt, but I didn't want to stop to take them out, and my mind was thinking. You would be amazed what goes through your mind on these long runs, no where to turn, except the turns on the long winding road, no one to talk to, and hopefully no one sees you.
I was trying so hard to have a good time, as in a good mile time, I was having an awesome experience, but I stopped to stretch halfway through, drink water, and eat some gels, mmmmmm, yummy, nothing better on a long run, and to tie my shoes, and situate the tongue of my shoes, it was digging into me, and of course at stop lights, I wish that you didn't have to do that, shouldn't people think, wow, that runner is at the speed she wants to be at, let's not have her stop at the light, let's stop for her? Ya, to good to be true. I am just glad that no one came to close to me, cars are scary, and they are big, and people don't watch, I've learned to look them in the eyes to make sure they see you.
I guess these experiences are why you train, and keep training...these months have been so amazing in my running life, I have accomplished so many things. I feel that I am a better person because of running, it has helped me to know that I can and will do hard things. I have taught my children that health is so important, and moving is vital. Hailey was running a couple of months ago at the gym with me, and she said to a much older person running too, "you need to run, or your going to die." Now that is extreme, but I'm glad she knows that exercise is key. That is something I wish I knew growing up. My parents had me in sports, but I thought it was to be the best....not for just overall good health.
Good healthy habits, are what I want to teach my kids, and I think showing them an example of that is key. I also want them to know, that we don't always have to win, I think that will take a lifetime to teach, but I will start young. I want them to know more, but that is a LONG and much more spiritual post.
Thanks for listening and reading, here's to many more miles....12 next Saturday!!! I encourage all of you who read my blog, to keep your personal goals and love doing them!!!
To all the runners out there, keep it up, the finish feels so good, better than In n Out...and yes, that is possible, for those who are wondering.

my "pit crew"

2010-01-27T15:01:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to do a post about the people in my life that encourage me to do everything I do, and when I am having a hard time. My pit crew can "pump up my heart", "change my oil" and help me remember to put "fuel"in my system and they are the BEST pit crew I could ever ask for.
Ryker, Hailey and Mike are key players in my pit crew. They are so great at encouraging me when I need it, they are always asking me when and how far I am going to run. They give me the best hugs and kisses on my way out the door on long runs, and make sure I have my phone, bagel, and water, and "lippy" (chap stick). They are on best behavior when Mike is "watching" them, while Mommy is out, and they even let me shower when I get home!!! That is always a plus, running clothes get wet, and then it gets cold wet, when you stop moving. That might be too much information, but it is really nice to take them off and put on regular warm clothes after a shower.

I just wanted to say thank you to them, we are getting geared up, 10 miles on Friday!!! Can't wait. It is sooo satisfying to look at how far you run, and know that you did that. It makes you think, hey, I can do anything!!! I will let you know updates, but really, maybe no one is interested in running....I don't know. Doesn't this apply to life though as well?
Dr. Berry says:
"If I can do the hard things I choose, it makes me believe I can do the hard things I don't choose."
Or something like that, but you get the picture.

Something NEW for 2010!!! YES, we cut Rykers' hair!!!
Just one question:
Have you laughed today? I have many times!!!!

Are you ready?

2010-01-18T11:23:00.000-08:00

Here's what I was thinking on Saturday....

8 miles....16 degrees....who's with me?

Oh, yeah, no one is this crazy!!!

Then I saw people along the way, awesome, and I thought how many miles are they doing today? What race are they getting ready for? Did they see that BEAUTIFUL sunrise?
Then a thought came to mind, it doesn't matter how many miles, what race, if any, it matters that they are out, and doing something they love.

Here's to running in freezing weather!!!! (Or really, here's to doing whatever you love, in whatever weather!)

I hope this all makes sense, because it's on the Internet!!!

It has been too long!

2010-01-10T15:48:00.000-08:00

Well I really don't know where to begin.
We ate too much food at Thanksgiving, and saw a lot of family, and had a ton of fun. We had a lot of laughs, and not a lot of sleep.
Christmas came all too quickly, and left too soon as well. It was so much fun to see their little faces on Christmas, when Santa did come, and they got all they wanted. The highlights were: Elefun, Hungry Hippos, Trucks, and Drill for Mike, and a Treadmill for me! We had a great time.
I signed up for a MARATHON, on May 15, 2010!!! I am so happy, and thrilled to do this. I am up to 7 1/2, I am feeling great, and loving every run. I can't wait to do this. Hailey is running the kids mile run, and she is soooo excited also.
Pictures to come!

He's getting sooo big!

2009-11-15T08:21:00.000-08:00

Ryker is 2 today! I can't believe how fast (looking back) it has gone, and so slow at the same time. He really loves his sister and always watches out for her, and wants to make sure she is taken care of. He is the sweetest little man I know. He always hugs me, and when life is rough, I can always count on him to cheer me up with that smile of his.
I am so glad that Ryker is in our life, he sure adds a lot. I don't know what I would do without him, and his little personality.
His nicknames are: Boba, Bobes, Prancing Princess (he wears Haileys' princess shoes, lately tap shoes, and won't take off her "Dorothy shoes".)
We got him a plasma bike, and motorcycles for his birthday, hopefully him loving girl things will pass. Oh, he throws fits, to wear the most sparkly things you ever could imagine. I hope we are just raising a well rounded little boy, who someday will shop with his wife, be sensitive, and understand women.
I could dream couldn't I?
As I write, he came in and tapped me on the shoulder and showed me the red "Dorothy shoes", he is always making me laugh.
He now says most of the abc's, counts to ten, and because of my discipline ways, he even counts backwards, he is talking all of the time, loves to read, loves to cook with me, and in his play kitchen, loves to throw Haileys' babies in the air, and then catch them, loves any kind of sports, and loves to run, he also loves to play and wrestle with anyone who will. He always jumps on me when I am exercising, he thinks it is time to wrestle. He is such a good little guy, and I love him.
He is getting so big, here is a picture of him, and to answer your question, no we have not cut his hair yet!!!

We are back, and going strong!

2009-11-06T17:11:00.000-08:00

These last couple of weeks have been CRAZY, and soooo hard on my mental, emotional, and physical state (s).
October 13: hailey threw up 9 times. (2 in her bed)
October 14: everyone not feeling good, no more throw ups, but fevers, chills, coughs, you name it. We went to the doctor, yes we were the ones in the waiting room, with the MASK. They were out of Tamiflu, down here, so they didn't check us for the swine, we were told had the flu, and to stay in until we feel better.
October 15: Ryker starts throwing up. (in his bed)
October 16: I crawled everywhere, BAD, body aches. No throw ups.
October 17: Ryker threw up, but we are all feeling a little better, and we are able to eat a little.
October 18: Ryker took a turn for the worse, instacare here we come, we thought he had pnemonia, he has Type A flu, we got the kids Tamiflu this time.
October 19: We are all doing a little bit better, and we are looking up, fevers even broke. Ryker threw up tonight, late, in his bed.
October 20: Meals were brought in and Mike returns to work. A hard day, but we are all feeling better.
October 21-24: We all got a little better, and then Mike got worse again. We took him to the instacare on the 25, and he had pnemonia. He got on Doxycycline, and that seemed to work great.
Well, on October 29, back to the doctor, this time for Ryker, his cough was bad, and causing him to really have to work at breathing, and with the whole sleep apnea thing going on, I didn't want to mess around. He got on breathing treatments, and they seemed to work great along with azithramycin.
We are all doing better, and swine free. I have even began to exercise again. I was so depressed, no exercise, TONS of laundry (26 loads), and sleeping or not sleeping on the kids floor, just waiting to catch throw up.
I am so glad that we are better, and that we are all breathing.
I hope all of you are doing well, and swine free. That is the worst thing that I have ever been through, oh, the body aches.

It is time for an update!!

2009-10-09T06:30:00.000-07:00

Hailey:
She had her first preschool field trip yesterday. I asked her if it would be okay if I came, she said "no, it is not for you." Well, I tried to ask the teacher if she needed more parents to come, without my dear Hailey seeing, and she came over to us, "I don't want you to come, mom!" Okay then, we went to pick her up from preschool, and she got in the car and said, "only pre school kids mom, not even Ryker can come," this time I didn't even say anything, so I gave up!
Well, sometime before bed on Wednesday morning, she said, "mom you can come!" I was confused, excited, and without a babysitter, because remember, Ryker could not come. Mike called his mom, and she said that she would watch him. We all got up on Thursday and got ready and I said something to the effect let's go, we have got to take Ryker to grandmas' to get babysat....all to get the reaction..."I changed my mind, I don't want you to come", so I got out of my "cute mom" clothes and changed into running clothes. I had her call grandma, and this was the phone call:
Hailey: you don't need to watch Ryker today, I changed my mind.
Grandma: Hi, Hailey, what's going on?
Hailey: I just don't want my mom to come, so we won't bring Ryker over, okay! Here's my mom....
Soooooo,sassy!
I didn't end up going, are you surprised? She had a great time, and lots of memories were shared at the dinner table last night. Her teacher said, she and everyone was getting out of the van, and the teacher said k, please hold hands and wait in a circle....Hailey sang at the top of her little voice, "let us gather in a circle, and kneel in family prayer"...she said she got all the kids going...too funny.

This is random but I want to remember it:
Last night we were reading scriptures, we were reading about the golden rule, and then it talks about the wise man and the foolish man, well we all said that we wanted to build our house on the rock, and we get to Hailey and she says I want to build my house on the sand, don't worry mom, I won't wash away! Later, she said that living on a rock would be pointy!
Ryker:
We got Ryker checked and the little man does have sleep apnea...so we will get his tonsils out in January. It makes me so sad and so nervous. It makes so much sense though, he doesn't sleep well at night, very clingy, and is a mouth breather, is a snorer, and the doctors say he probably stops breathing to eat, that is why he chokes, at almost every meal. He wakes up every night, at least three times, just screaming. I thought he had night terrors....nope, sleep apnea. I would wake up terrified too, if I woke up and wasn't breathing. He is such a happy guy, and we love him. It makes me nervous, scared and happy all at the same time, I am sooo happy that we found out, so he can hopefully get fixed.
We are getting ready for a long winter, it is sooo cold here. The mountains were so pretty, all painted with color. We took a drive up to the canyon, and Hailey said, "wow, Heavenly Father can sure paint!" It is too cold to go outside until the afternoon, so my running has been a little off schedule, one day at this time, and one day here, but at least I'm still doing it right? I love being a mom, they are so much fun, and so much work!

Preschool, birthday, and Ryker!

2009-09-14T14:46:00.000-07:00

I was planning such a cute post in my head.....
First day of school was September 8, 2009, for Ms. Hailey. We got up and took it pretty easy, ate a lot of breakfast, got dressed, took a lot of pictures, and drove to the preschool. She did so good, I was worried, I hated preschool, actually I hate to admit it, but yes, I was a preschool drop out. Ryker was sooo sad, he was crying so bad, that we all had to walk her to the door, instead of letting her run in.
We got re loaded and we took off to a sweet park that I found, you run around the trail twice, and it is a mile. We ran 5 miles, I was planning on running into the store, and getting some presents, but then I looked at our little Ryker who actually fell asleep, his ear was leaking....what?
I called the doctor and the receptionist was like, you need to bring him in.....at 12:30, I was thinking perfect, I'll run home, get lunch made, and go get Hailey from preschool. We got out again, Ryker went and stood at the door, he was waiting so cute, as soon as it opened he yelled, "Hayey", it was too cute. Then we were off to the doctors.
We get there, and we check in, eat our lunch in the waiting room, and well, wait. Rykers name was called, and we got the news of an ear ache, and huge tonsils. The doctor didn't want to prescribe any ear drops, because this is his first one since tubes, and we do not have any insurance, he said that they would be too expensive....so we were in the attempt to wait it out. With three nights of not sleeping, holding him night and day, and motrin and tylenol repeats to the point that I was forgetting which ones turn it was.....I caved and had them call in a prescription. We did not fill it then, i just wanted it called in for the weekend. Well we just carried on with our crazy life, until Saturday...his poor little ear was all swollen and he was not getting any better. I called the on call doctor, and she said that when it gets swollen the infection is not draining, and actually getting deeper.
I went and got the RX, and to my surprise, it was oral drops. My doctor had called in an oral drop, to save us money. I really appreciate him, and how he looks out for us.
Haileys birthday was on September 10...I cannot believe that she is 4....she is such a blessing in my life...she is sooo sweet, and very fun. I got to go to school to spotlight her for the first 15 minutes. We told the class what she likes to do, and where she likes to go, and we gave them her favorite treat, Costco cookies! She told me to tell them that her favorite place to go was Costco and the Library.
The night of her birthday, we had a combined party to celebrate her uncles too, they are on the same day. We had all breakfast stuff, it was a hit. I hope she had a great day.
We have celebrated her birthday for like two weeks straight. We gave her and Ryker Coaster Cars, they are a lot like Plasma Bikes. She got to love them in CA and that is all we have heard about since. We got Rykers birthday present early, so they won't fight, and even the same color, we have had a lot of fun on those.
As for Hailey and preschool, she is learning soooo much and having such a great time. I hope that this lasts, she always says funny things that she thinks she remembers, it is soooo funny. She is learning so many new poems, how to write lower case letters, and learning the sound, she is loving to sing lately, every time she is bored, "My father has a family it's me, it's you", "I am a builder", or "She wears high heels, I wear flip flops" comes out. Her and Ryker both love to sing the song, "Why does love always feel like a battlefield," they say armor sooooo funny.
Soooo, anyway, we are all doing better, last night we all slept, and we are all feeling great. Rykers ears have stopped oozing soooo much, and now I only have to wipe it 2 times a day, instead of like 6.
We made an appointment in october for Rykers tonsils, we'll see how that goes.

We are excited!!!!

2009-08-14T11:08:00.000-07:00

In N Out is coming, and it's going to be SUPER close. Maybe a little too close, seriously, .7, not even a mile away.
We have been running passed a construction cite for a few weeks now, and just today I noticed a sign, In N Out coming SOON.
I told Hailey and we both just were smiling, and saying "Oh, how fun, and exciting!" Hailey said, "like the one in California, with all of our friends?" I know she will love the food, but the lack of friend part, not so much. We miss our friends in California EVERYDAY!!!

A LOT!!! VAN, California, and grapes.

2009-08-01T16:06:00.000-07:00

I have not posted in a long time:
This is what we have been up to. In the middle of July, I got a new car, not any car...a mini van. I know what many of you are thinking, because I thought the same feelings for many years now. But I love the van, and so do the kids. They have so much room. We ended up getting the KIA SEDONA, it's just great, seriously, love it. The kids have a van dance, and they always point to other vans and say we have one too mom.

We also went on a trip to California, and it was amazing. The kids did not do so good on the plane ride there, but on the flight home, some amazing things can happen when they get doughnuts....if you know me good enough....doughnuts are not in my house very often, so the kids were in heaven. I don't think Ryker knew what to do with himself.

We stayed with our wonderful California family. They were soooo nice, and very accommodating. We LOVE you guys so much. We loved every minute with you all. Mike loved, absolutely loved the outside shower, so did the kids. We cannot thank you enough.
Thursday we flew in, and some good friends were so kind they came and got us from the airport. Thank you sooo much, I was not used to getting a ride home, because when we lived there I just ran home, well, they said they would not let that happen, and they came and got us. We enjoyed an awesome mexican dinner at their home later that night. We saw a lot of their family that night, which was so nice, it seemed like old times. We just picked up from where we left off. Hailey and Ryker were in heaven. We watched some funny America's got Talent, which to this day I laugh out loud when I think of that girl, who all of a sudden when punk, hilarious.
On Friday, we saw some of Mikes' former co-workers, and saw his former desk. It was great seeing them, and catching up. Then we were off to the beach, we went with
many friends, and my little family. It was sooo much fun. We had never been to the bay beach, it was so nice not to have waves. I appreciate Daniel for saving Hailey. She went under water for some brief seconds and he got her up, she is one brave cookie! We then carried the water fun over to the house. Ryker was asleep, but Hailey had fun on the water slide with the boys. We as parents, just enjoyed each others company in the shade, as some of us, who will remain nameless, got sunburned. After the water was over it was on to Plasma bikes, they are awesome, and that is all Hailey has talked about since. She had so much fun. Thanks for sharing your bikes, Ryker loved them as well. We then had a pizza party and just enjoyed the night as friends.

On Saturday, after airing out our swim stuff all night, we were off to Wild Rivers. We had never been. It was sooo much fun, I went on three water slides, which is great considering I had not been on any since I was 12. Thanks Mike for watching the kids so I could go. It was great seeing Ryker in the water, and Hailey sure enjoyed herself. She went down a water slide and so did Ryker. They did awesome!!! Ryker and Mike LOVED the lazy river, and Hailey loved just being in the water with her friends. I love seeing them have fun, and enjoy themselves just being kids. After that we went on to see the baseball game. During the second game, we took orders and went to In n out. We needed our fix!!! We had a lot of fun watching the game, and the guys did great.

On Sunday, we woke up and got ready for church, and ready for the wedding, and packed our bags to leave....yes leave already...too soon. Church was soooo great. Man I miss that ward, and the feeling of unity there. I loved seeing all the people that were so easy to love, and we saw a lot of new faces that were so welcoming. It was so nice. Then we went to the wedding, of our good friend and his lovely bride. It was a beautiful wedding, and we are so happy for them. They looked so happy. It was nice to see him find such a sweet woman to be with, and grow with. Congrats to you!! The kids were ready to go, they had a few melt downs, so we left before I got wedding cake...I had waited all day and took the necessary steps so that I could have cake.....so Mike stopped by Yum Yum doughnuts and let me get some. We got enough for a treat that night and in the morning. They were so yummy. That night I talked with "mom" for a long time, and I just wanted to tell her thank you for listening and being such an awesome friend, and mom. She is sooooo wonderful. I wanted to thank her wonderful husband too, he is so supportive and just a wonderful man.

Monday, we woke up early and headed to the airport. It was really sad, I didn't want to come home. Like I said the flight was great, and no crying from my section of the plane this time.

This week has been just a whirlwind of things to do, work to catch up on, schedules to get back to, kind of craziness. We did a lot of laundry, went running, went to the library came home with 15 books, read them all day every day, and went to parks.

Today we are grateful to have our kids. Ryker choked on a grape, it was totally caught in his throat, turning blue, not making a sound, eyes closing, his jaw was also locked so Mike could not get in, I was in panic mode, trying to remember what I had learned in EMT classes. But really all I was doing was crying, Mike told me to leave, and he kept hitting Rykers' back, it was soooo scary. I tried to call 911 but my phone could not get service in 3 different rooms, trying 3 different times. Mike finally got it out. We are blessed to have our kids tonight and every other day. This incident has taught me that life is so precious. It was so hard to see such a full of life little guy lifeless and not breathing.
I'm reading CPR books, and trying to catch up on my stuff, as I write this. I am so grateful for Mike, who didn't panic, and helped and saved our little guy. Hailey has said all day, "my dad is a pretend fire fighter and saved my little brother Ryker."

CORRECTION!!!!

2009-07-14T13:50:00.000-07:00

I am so sorry to all my running friends....a couple of posts ago, I said that I didn't even come close to running 100 miles in a month, well I just found my real records of the last 2 training months for our 1/2 marathon, and I am sorry. WE RAN so much, and it was a total 215 miles of from Nov 17- Jan 17. Someone should have called me on it, we ran hard and we ran a lot. SORRY!!!

Wow! What I have learned and felt this week.

2009-07-12T20:03:00.000-07:00

I was so pleased with this past week. I was so good emotionally, and spiritually and I hate to say it, but kind of physically. I didn't yell at my kids or Mike once, and I read scriptures every day, and worked on other personal things, and was really just feeling good. I got answers to prayers that I have been fasting for and saying for months, and I finally felt peace, and I was calm. I LAUGHED a lot with my kids, and found them HILARIOUS and so much fun to be around. We (me and the kids) even ran the most I have EVER ran in a week, I ran 30.5 miles. I am so pleased, but yet I feel empty.
I need to work on a lot, and that is kind of an under statement, I am getting better though. I went to church today, and the lesson was on Temple going.....well... I have not been in a long time. (like 2-3 months) Anyway, I got thinking I make all this time for running, pilates, scriptures, and reading self help books on how to become better, and understand "you" (which in this case means me), maybe I just need to go to the Temple. I have thought a lot on this subject this past week and a lot on it today, and I think I should make a goal to go once a week. Living where I do, there is NO REASON why I should not be able to.
Anyway, these are just some of my thoughts, I feel I need to write down to remember that I need to work on them.
I love the gospel and its teachings and its TRUTH, and so I need to be better and go the House of the Lord, and serve others.

Pictures, pictures, and more pictures!!!!!

2009-07-05T16:54:00.000-07:00

These are the pictures that have been taken this summer, the Luau for my dad, fourth of July parade and Freedom Festival, at home swimming, and before church today. These kids are so much fun, and these are priceless memories. I am so glad that Mike has the smarts to put these on to share with you all. I watched him, and it was a lot of steps, but I'm thinking maybe I will do pictures by myself, someday.
Hope all of you had a wonderful fourth of July and are enjoying your summer.

Everything is BOINGA!!!

2009-07-02T15:21:00.000-07:00

Well, that title is a song off the Backyardagains, and that is how I feel. Let me explain.
Yesterday was a challenging day. I woke up to Ryker running in and getting me up yelling mamma! I think it was at 6:30, but I really don't know. We went for a run, that is a great thing by the way, I am back to running and running with the kids everyday. I've already done over 15 miles this week. I did not reach my 100 mile goal this month due to the injury but I hit 60+ which is okay in my book. Anyway back to yesterday, so we came back from our run, and Hailey goes to the bathroom and asks me to wipe her, so I did, got her off, and in came Ryker with my phone, and threw it into the toilet faster than I could catch it. My first reaction was wow, did that just happen? Then without even thinking my hand dove into pee water to get the phone! I wiped it off, called Mike and was surprised it even called.I put it in rice and left it alone, when the rice started talking. My phone was making random phone calls and called Robin. She was so funny, laughing so hard that Ryker dropped it in the toilet and then my phone dropped the call. Sorry I tried to call back, but my phone had a mind of its own.
Well, I still don't have a phone, but I do have a "boy" now. Just this week take downs, head butting, making Hailey scream all has begun. It makes me laugh, but I want to cry.
Mike takes the car to work, I didn't have the phone, I didn't know how to work a "virtual computer" which resulted in no Internet yesterday, I felt as if I was off the planet. So what did I do yesterday? Baked all day! We had parmesan chicken, baked potatoes, corn on the cob, oatmeal cookies, and lemon squares!
What a day, what an amazing SWISH!!!

Not much, but I feel I should post something!

2009-06-29T15:44:00.000-07:00

This summer has flown by....
My dad turned 60 today, and he had a celebration for him this past weekend. We had it Hawaiian style. My sister hired entertainment and everything. We had fire, Haka, and Hula dancers. They even taught us how to do it! We set the backyard up and we transformed it, we felt like we were in a real Hawaiian Luau. It was sooo awesome. My dad is an amazing dad, and person, so I am so glad that we did it to celebrate his life.
Yesterday we celebrated 7 years of being married. I have had the time of my life. I am so grateful for him, and my kiddos. I am so blessed to have them in my life, well, forever.
I sure am glad that we have forever to work on being better! I am grateful that we are sealed to each other, and that we have the gospel in our lives.
We put up bunk beds in the kids room last night, that is right Ryker is out of the crib and unto the bottom bunk, Hailey loves the top bed. They did really good last night. We have a set where they can be made into two twin beds when we want them to. We will do that when they have their own room. For now, it makes it so much more roomy in their bedroom.
Something HUGE happened today, I put the kids down for a nap, took a little nap with them, woke up when Hailey did, I put her in charge of Ryker and told her I wanted to mow the front lawn. She is amazing, and all she wanted was a treat and a capri sun, Ryker is STILL asleep, she normally wakes him up, I guess it is easier to "babysit" while he is asleep. I thought that was worth writing down, I NEVER go outside and do anything without them, not even take out the garbage. SMALL STEPS PEOPLE, work with me.
I have pictures of everything, so I will post them soon. I might not post me learning to Hula, it depends on how I feel, you might just be that lucky!
I hope everyone is having a fabulous summer, and many more posts to come about vacations and friends, and summer nights. We have a few vacations planned and it will be great to see MANY loved ones soon!!!

REMEMBERING.....

2009-06-10T09:32:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was my Grandpa's birthday, he passed away at 94, in 2005. He was the best grandpa, I miss him still everyday, but I know that we all will see him again. I can't wait to see and hug him again. I am so glad that Mike got to meet him, he was an amazing man.
Today was Jason's birthday, Mikes' brother who has passed away too. He would have been 27 today. We miss him so much, and we talk about him a lot. We too, know that we will see him again someday, and hear his laugh, see his smile, and get to talk with him again.
Here is a picture of Jason. He will never be forgotten. We love and miss you "brother."

Well, here is an update. I am so sorry I misled you, my grandpas birthday is in July not in June. Wow, did I ever mess up. He was born in 1911 on July 9. He passed away on May 6, 2004. I remember it so well, it was during the Friends finale. This was way before Tivo, DVR, or anything. I will always remember him, and we miss him so much. Sorry for the mistake.

"Gimp!"

2009-06-09T19:29:00.000-07:00

Well, if you read the last post, you know that I have been pretty consistent running lately....well, that all came to a halt Sunday after church. I was carrying Ryker and I FELL on the sidewalk walking to the car. I totally messed up my right knee, Ryker is fine and didn't even realize we went down, thank goodness. Well that night I couldn't sleep, couldnt really do anything. So, long story short, I went the doctor and am grateful they didn't laugh at me, well, x rays and everything, my knee is just badly hurt, very swollen and really in a lot of pain. I am grateful that it is not broken in any way, I just wish I could get off the toilet normal....wow, that takes some work!!!
I am so embarrassed but might as well let the world know that I am a bit clumsy. That is why I have not done any running this week, and hope to by Saturday, but I don't want it to get worse...but I want to get back on my running shoes. Hopefully they still fit, my foot is swollen as well.
Hailey and Ryker are doing quite well, they are being so gentle with my knee. Mike just calls me Gimp. I am grateful that he is able to help out with the kids and stuff, while I am down.
I wanted to tell everyone thanks for your comments about my well being. I also wanted to let everyone know not to worry, I am fine. I asked the doctor if it is normal for hormones and periods, and all that good stuff to come back after having babies, with a vengeance, and they said it happens a lot. They said it should get better, so we are waiting for it to get better. I just want my family to know that I love them and appreciate them for all they do and put up with.
Some good news:
MIKE HAS A JOB OFFER!!!! He will start on Monday. It is quite a commute, but we are very pleased. Hopefully everything will return to normal around here. I am so happy and grateful for the time we have had with him. He is a great guy and an even better daddy. I am so happy that he wants to provide for us. I love him so much. We have had a lot of fun together, as a family, time that we wouldn't have had otherwise.

100+ mile month!!!

2009-06-03T06:49:00.000-07:00

In May I ran over 100 miles!! I was sooo excited. I looked back to previous months of hard training for the half marathon, and my records show that I didn't run close to that much in a month. I was so proud of myself. I have been waking up early in the morning and doing my running. I was fortunate enough to run in a 10k, and my time has improved, I ran a 9 min and 41 second mile. I finished the run in under an hour, that was my goal. I am so proud of my Hailey she ran a kid race, and was awesome, she has the perfect form. She is going to do another run in June, and a triathlon in August. She got to run with some really great friends, and talked about it for DAYS!!! She woke up on the day of the race, and thanks to the Backyardagains, she sang "It's racing day, it's racing day!" I am so pleased that she loves to run. I run without them quite a lot now, and she gets really sad. She says "You trained without me". I then take her and Ryker on a little run that includes a park in the middle.
I know that I have not written in a long time, so here is a little update.
Ryker:
Got tubes in his ears, and is a totally different guy. He actually sleeps, and is not so clingy. He had a hard time the day of the procedure, they had to give the little guy morphine. It was hard, but we are blessed to get that done. Ryker loves to run through the sprinklers, ride on Haileys bike, and BUGS. He is always handing me a bug. He is talking soooo great now. I love him so much. What a great kid. He is going to the doctor today for a check up on his ears. He weighs 24 pounds and is such a kid now, he has started nursery, already, and is doing great. (Mike drops him off, I don't think I would leave him.)
Hailey:
Wants to play with friends...? What, she has more of a life than I do. She says the funniest things and is so sweet and caring....most of the time. Up at the hospital when Ryker was getting tubes, she was sooo sad and didn't want them to hurt Ryker. She really loves her brother. She loves to be outside, and ride her bike. She weighs 30 pounds and is always telling us how much bigger she is than Ryker, not for long I am afraid though. She loves to draw, color, and READ. She hands me like 20 books a day, not exaggerating. She loves them. She is so excited for preschool, I think it will be good for her to learn from someone else. She was so blessed yesterday, she fell at the zoo on her arm on bark, her arm was in back while her body was in front, I thought she had done some serious damage, but we stretched it and did pinwheels, and the Lord blessed her.
Mike:
Continues to look for a job. He is doing some intense searching, hopefully something will come through. The kids and I love him at home, I don't think they will know what to do without their daddy here, if he gets a new job. He leaves to go somewhere and Hailey and Ryker freak out for like an hour, "Where did he go?" It will be hard, but it's been fun for Mike and the kids to get to play together.
Jess:
I am still having my moments of being sad, mad, happy, excited, well just all over the place. My hormones have came back and they are in full force. I am trying so hard to control this, and have had some serious conversations with the Lord. I want to give them all to Him, through the Atonement...but I need to release them, I think that is the hardest part. I have been better lately though. I feel bad for my family, they shouldn't have to deal with an emotional mom. I kind of freak out sometimes. The song "Jesus take the wheel" comes to mind, and I for sure don't listen to country. It is not my season to do anything I want during the day, hence I wake up early to do my stuff.
We have had fun playing softball, going to the zoo, roller skating, bike rides, volleyball, yard work, and just doing stuff together. This summer will be a great one, can't wait to go on some much needed vacations.
Sorry this blog is soooo long, if you are still reading..thanks. I could not do what I do without all of you and your support.
I wanted to let you all know, that I drove to the zoo on the freeway and did not even feel drowsy, I hope that continues, I have not had a episode like that in awhile...thank goodness.

Tragedy.....take 2

2009-04-07T15:51:00.000-07:00

Well, I know some of you saw my last post and then probably are wondering why it was gone., Let me explain, if you know ANYTHING about Mike he is a very private guy, and his family are very much the same. I felt bad for blogging about the situation as soon as I did, with all the details.
Well, Mike said I could put it back on...so here we go.
On Thursday morning, we were listening to the primary songs and finishing exercising, when Mike called me into his "Office," aka our bedroom. He then told me of the bad, terrible, horrific news. He said, "Something bad happened last night, Jason by brother died." I went numb, I had to look on the Internet for the story to make it REAL to me. We didn't know what to do, and to be frank we still really don't. Mike and his family are doing really great, and staying super close to each other and to the Lord. It was a super neat experience at their home, all the family (four boys and both parents) all got blessings from each other. It is a night I will never forget and I don't think any of them will. I am so grateful for the peace that we can feel even at bad times in our lives. It is a true personal testimony that He loves us, and really cares for us, I knew that, but now I really do .
Jason was in a car accident and we think killed immediately, which was a blessing. He was ejected, it gives me the chills to write that. Which again, I think was a blessing, the car caught fire, and people had to be rescued. He was the only one that died, but a lot are hurt and I don't know there stories.
I hope we can all learn something from this. Mike was and is an awesome brother. Being the oldest of the boys, he has set a great example. We feel blessed to have gotten to know him better these few years we have lived in Utah closer to him. He was such a funny guy! He will be missed.
Mike has done a lot with the arrangements and I am grateful for that, I think it helps. He wrote the obituary, and he is going to post that soon. He is also putting a picture video together, which I THINK we should be able to post. He is also talking at the funeral, which should be a shock to everyone. Mike doesn't do that, it will be a great tribute to Jason. Mike will do great, and I am proud of him for doing it.
Mike is doing as well as can be expected, the same with his family. We just wish we would have had more time with him. I am sooo grateful we know the plan and that we will see him again. Please keep Mike and his family in your prayers.

On a brighter side of things:

Ryker is growing up sooo fast. He is saying new words and lots of them everyday. He loves to read and learn just like his sister. He is a funny little guy, he is always copying someone. He is always making me laugh. He is running everywhere, he loves basketball still. When we are in the car, he just sits in his car seat saying bball, seeing all the basketball hoops as we drive, it is soooo funny. He brings me diapers when he needs to be changed, and always wants to throw the old ones in the garbage. He even sat on the potty today, nothing came, but good start.

Hailey loves to read and learn, she is sooo excited about going to pre-school in the fall. She makes me call her school girl! She wrote so many names today, I didn't know she even knew how. She showed me that she knows how to draw a flower, this kid is amazing! She loves to play with her friends. She is super silly with her dad, and her brother. She says the funniest things. I just laugh all of the time.

I am so grateful for my family, and the knowledge of being with them forever. I don't know what I would do without these kids, and my wonderful husband. I love you all soooo much.

Pictures of everyone and everything will come as soon as life slows down a little. It has been pretty nuts, around here.

Thanks to ALL my friends!!!

2009-03-23T07:31:00.000-07:00

Thank you to all of you that read my bitter blog. I am so grateful to have you all in my life. Your comments helped me be soooo grateful for my life, my family, our savings, and the gospel.
Just so you all know, things are going MUCH, MUCH better. We still don't have a job, or the two kid thing mastered yet....but we are working on both. These kids are so amazing, they make me laugh so hard. They really sense when you need to be cheered up, they come and say the cutest things, give hugs, or just want you to hold them. I love being a mom, and a wife.
Updates on kids that will hopefully make you smile:
Ryker is walking, and walking everywhere. He is such a silly little guy. He LOVES basketball, like LOVES it, to the point if he sees ANYTHING round or a hoop, he says "bball" until we go get it for him, or let him out of the highchair. We were at church and he sees the hoop in the gym, and the whole ward knows he wants the basketball hoop, because everyone can hear him!! We are going to get him a little standard for Easter, he will love it. He has also started to recognize places, when we pulled into my moms, he said mammas, and when we pulled home one day, he said pappas. It is so sweet, he really gets excited these days. It must be fun to be one, it sure is fun watching him grow. He is teething, so that is really sad, but he is doing great, couldn't ask for more.
Our little Hailey, is getting soooo big. She loves to run, and can run really fast and well for such a little thing. Yesterday she asked us to go for a walk with her while I pushed Ryker and she pushed her Ryker. Daddy came too, which never happens, it was really sweet. Hailey loves to read, she brings me books all of the time and wants me to read to her. She loves craft monday, she loves to pick what we do, it's a lot of fun. I can't believe she will be old enough to go to pre-school in the fall, it's so neat. She says the funniest things, just a couple of days ago, she said "Mike, what the heck, you just dorked me with the ball!" She also says not the best words, we were up at my moms, and she babysits my nephews, and for some reason my 5 year old nephew comes down and says "Hailey called me an ass twice." I didn't know what to do other than to say what did you do, and then say sorry. I need to be careful, don't I?
I helped my mother in law make an apron for Hailey for Easter. It will be so cute. Thank you for your help, and patience with me. She is soooo great and creative, she can work wonders.
Anyway, so that is the happier update on our family. I got a great peaceful feeling yesterday that everything will be okay. I sure live for those moments, I think we have to.
I know other people are having hard times right now, and you all are in my thoughts and prayers, I hope we all can have better days and remember them when the bad ones come to the surface.
Thanks again, love you all.

A Bad Day, it all began at 7:10!!!

2009-03-19T19:08:00.000-07:00

Update on Mikes work situation:
There is NOT a working situation anymore. He was working for a company based out of Arizona, but that ended and now we are back to square one. I can't believe it. He wants to start his own business but says that I am a distraction, and that the kids are noisy. I feel like an intruder in my own home. Needless to say, we go places everyday, and stay there a LONG time. I get sooo bugged that we can't be here, being who we are. I just am having a hard time with this. I feel like the worst wife, I try to be supportive, but it's sooo hard when I don't see the results. I don't mean to be bitter, but....
I should back up a little, so you know what kind of week I have had. I went to see my parents this week (to get out of the house so it could be quiet) and on the way home, I fell asleep three times on the way home, on the freeway. To everyone, I know I am stupid and this will never happen again. I was talking to my mom tonight and told her, and she had a different spin on things. She was grateful that I didn't hit the wall the first time, and the two semi's the next two times. I really felt someone telling me to wake up, and then feeling someone help me NOT over correct. I still cannot believe how dumb I was. Two sleeping, innocent kids in the back, and then me being sooooo irresponsible, and stupid in the front. I am so grateful to the Lord and the angels who helped me get my angels home safe that day. I was not tired and I still don't know what happened. I felt like the crappiest mom ever, and still do.
And that brings us to today:
This morning began nice and early, Hailey seems to love to wake up at 7:10 (I hate daylight savings time, something in me wishes I was moving to Arizona!), and she comes and gets me, and this morning I did not want to move until Ryker woke up, which was at 7:23, so I got out of bed and started the day.
Haileys' earrings has been having some issues lately, and every time we need to clean them, wow, she is screaming and yelling, kicking, and this morning she called me mean mommy. I almost cried. I gave up, Mike I think got it cleaned out. I think he gave up too and took the other one out too. It has been almost three months, so I hope her holes don't close in.
Then came the play dough fun, her friend Hayley came over and played with her. Ryker wanted to but he ate it again, so I ended that pretty fast. Play date went well, but my mind was just already on "over it."
Then I was going to attempt Costco. Well Mike looked at me and said I was crazy taking two kids alone to Costco with the day I was having. So, as with everything, Mike gets his way. I stayed home and made lunch for us (mostly him, I'm fine with sandwiches).
Then I put Ryker in his highchair and made Fajitas for lunch. I was trying to keep my spirits up. I love to cook and clean when I have a lot on my mind.
Nap time was next. They fell asleep great, and I got to exercise while they were asleep. It felt really great.
I thought "oh the day is better after naps, let's go outside and clean out the car, vacuum , wipe, everything." To my surprise it went pretty well.
Then I started to go on a walk with some of the moms from my ward. OH MY!!! They were soooo naughty. Hailey didn't want to ride, she wanted to push everyone's stroller. Then the treats weren't enough for Ryker today, he SCREAMED the entire time. Well I cut the walk short and went home.
Then, Mike said that it was time for Costco. We ate dinner there. Right in the middle of dinner, they evacuated the entire place! They said that they had gotten a bomb threat. Anyway, so we left and went to Wal-mart. We first went home to grab the ads, because they match...anyway....matching takes a lot of concentration...I will NOT be doing this anytime soon. I just really needed milk and bananas, but if I would have known what was going to happen I would have stayed home.
We go into Wal-mart, and we head for the produce. Well, everything was okay. Ryker and Hailey are both in the cart. I am looking for things that match, and that we need. Well Mike gets her out, because she was being good, while Ryker pulls on the apples in a bag, and Hailey grabs them from him to put them back, and BLAM, he is on the floor quicker than I could catch him. I see it all in slow motion, throw everything down and go to my child who is now on the floor scared out of his mind. His neck is bent, and his body is in back of him, he cried in my arms sooo loud, and hard. Hailey was so sad, I know she didn't mean to, she said sorry a lot, but I didn't know what to do. Mike came over and I know he was trying to be nice, but, he grabbed Ryker from me and said "lets finish our shopping", What? I am in panic mode, Rykers' head was facing a direction that did not look good, and he wants to just finish shopping and move on.....I wanted to comfort him, and I wanted Mike to get Hailey so I didn't have to worry about her. I ended up giving him to Mike, and was just so sad the entire time. I used to work in the grocery stores and see this all of the time....now I am THAT mom....I feel sooooo bad, I just wish I could have done something, anything....I am a terrible mom. I want to let you know, that both kids are great tonight, and they are both asleep and Ryker CAN move....blessings.....wherever I can find them. Hopefully tomorrow is a better day. My mom also said something tonight to think about, she said that we all can think a little bit more before we judge and think bad things about "those" moms we see, that have unfortunate things happen to their kids. I know I will, next time I witness something sad. Two people came over to me, and asked how he was, and one even said babies move sooo fast. Thank you for not judging me.
I just need to go for a LONG run, and stop eating everything in sight.
Sorry for depressing you, thanks for reading my blog and being my friend.
So much for trying to save money in this economy right? Full prices, and healthy kids sounds a lot better to me.
Jess

Pictures!

2009-03-01T09:01:00.000-08:00

Here are the promised pictures.

New month, should mean new post.

2009-02-26T18:00:00.000-08:00

Well. It has been a crazy month. I know all of my posts start the same, but it sooo true. Mike is working from home, and well for anyone who has done that, you know what I mean. It has been sooo hard. But at least he is working right?
Ryker is still not walking, man he is driving me bonkers! He has started talking, he says mamma, uhuh for no, and Haigey, and ba, for banana, bite bye and of course BALL, he loves any kind, definitely a boy, he is a fun little guy to have around. He pooped on the potty too, I'm not potty training a little guy who can't even walk, but it was still a good thing right? I don't even want to think about that right now. I am glad that we don't have the "blumps" anymore. Earlier this month we all were sick with the flu, Haileys' lasted 6 days, and Rykers' lasted 9 days, mine and Mikes' only were the 24 hour, I felt sooo bad. Anyway, Hailey combined blowing chunks, and she called it the "blumps." Sooo cute, out of something completely ugly.
Hailey on the other hand is soooo funny. She had her first primary program on Sunday, and she new all the words, and believe me WE ALL could here her. I was in the over flow, and Mike was standing by the stage in the gym, and HE and I could here her perfect. At least she wasn't the one picking her nose right? Hailey is such a little mommy. We were watching Dr. Phil, the one about the eight babies....she said mom, I'm going to need some help, I only have two hands, how am I going to carry eight babies? A three year old said and implied ALL to well what we are all thinking. So, we went to a store this month, and she went right over to a picture of Christ and a little child and she said mom look, Savior beside me! How cute is that? So, later this month, I bought it for her for Valentines, I gave it to her, trying to not think of the cost......she said mom, it's not my size, I am only three! Needless to say, I returned it and bought two post card size ones, so that she would be happy. She is so funny, she carries them everywhere.
Well, busy, crazy, just testified. Ryker was quiet, which can't be good right, he was into the bug catchers, the terminex people left in areas where they cannot spray. Sticky mess, you might ask? Yes. He and Hailey are in the bathtub as we speak. Mental note if this happens to anyone, vegetable oil...water does not help, and neither does alcohol. If it is in the hair, vegetable oil works there as well.
Gotta go, but I will post my and Haileys' new hair cut soon. It makes her look so big.
I decided to blog more tonight instead of finishing the laundry. I wanted to post that we went to the park yesterday, which really was today, anyway, it was Rykers first real time at the park, we took him last year but he didn't do much. Ryker hates the swing, and loves the slides. Totally opposite of Hailey. Hailey loved being at the park again, I love spring time. I love spending precious fun time with my kids.
Today, which is today literally, we played play dough....good times. I thought wow, why haven't we done this more? Well, I will tell you, within seconds, Ryker put the whole orange blob in his mouth, after reading the bottle, non-toxic, I just had to laugh. That is pretty salty stuff, I felt bad. Hailey was doing good, so I thought...there were little pieces on the floor, which were on her shoes, and almost in the carpet....and that my friends is why moms don't do play dough....I guess. Anyway, we are all still alive, after a WILD night at Chuckee Cheeses. The kids had so much fun at that place.

I finished the half marathon in 2 hours and 17 minutes!!!

2009-01-18T18:34:00.000-08:00

Well, it finally came....
Race Day was so awesome. I am soooo glad I did it. To anyone who wants to do this and doesn't think they can, oh you can, you can and you will love it. It was the most amazing feeling crossing that finish line. Mike and the kids were there waiting for me, and it was great to share the happiness with them. They helped me train. Mike and the kids got to watch the race from Grandpa's house, the trail was right there, how awesome was that? I trained with four amazing girls, and we all finished, good job girls, it was a great run!
Hailey wanted to race as well, so that morning we got dressed together me in my running outfit, and her in hers, her hair like mine, breakfast the same, and of course we both needed to use the potty. I also made her a matching number. She thought she was racing, it was soooo cute.
At the end of the race, I put my medal on her, and she said no, I haven't done the kid race yet! We took her to the park and she raced these 2 older boys, and she won, or should I say smoked them!!!! It was so neat, she is a real runner. She was on the way home and said I need a shower!
Here's to more running, who knows if I'll do more, but I am soooo glad I did this one, Thanks to all those who helped me and encouraged me, you know who you are, and I LOVE YOU!!!!! See you with my double jogger!!! I "heart" running, and I am soooo glad I am NOT too sore.

Why does watching your kids grow up make YOU sad?

2009-01-03T07:29:00.000-08:00

So this weekend has been hard for me, in TWO ways. First of all, I stopped "feeding" Ryker. I know what you all are thinking....how old is he? To answer your question he is 13 1/2 months. I "fed" Hailey until she was this old also. Mike has told me the Ryker has been "recreational eating" for awhile now, but I have had a hard time because he is my last baby. So....bring on the soreness for a week, and FINALLY I can wear a tight sports bra, so that I don't worry about losing my milk!!!
Hailey is now a SUNBEAM! I know this is all normal and Hailey NEEDS to grow up, but last Sunday when I dropped her off and picked her up from her LAST nursery class, it was soooo sad. Hailey turned to me on the way out to the car, "don't be sad mom, I'm happy." I have had the hardest time with this.....She has had many people call and ask me if she can come over and play with them, and I tell their parents NO, because I have a hard time dropping her off, and WONDERING the whole time she is gone, if.."If she is okay," "If she is crying," "If she is sharing, or if her friends are sharing," "If she needs to go potty and feels comfortable going at the house," the list goes on and on, believe me it does, and I don't know if this is normal. I feel so bad, I know she needs this social part of her life, but how do I get passed it?
Here are some updates:
Ryker is now pushing everything we own out of his way, he is WALKING WITH everything. It is sooo funny. He says, "ot,oh" and "mo" meaning more, and for those of you who remember Haileys' little water noise, yes Ryker does that as well, so funny. We are working with him doing the stairs, and practicing "feet first", he is doing really well. Hailey is doing great with letters, she now knows the upper and lower case letters, still getting b and d confused, but really who can blame her? She is doing sooo well with numbers too. We read letters all of the time, and now have started sounding out letters together. She knows t, p, k, n, b, r,w,m,h,e,g,l,o,s,y,and we will be working on others soon. He and Hailey are really doing better, they are not coughing anymore and they are sleeping great.
They play with each other now, and that is soooo nice. It has been a hard year, of teaching Hailey to play nice with him, and teaching ME how to be patient, and kind towards them ALL of the time. They really get along great now, and I think the stars are aligned for at least this moment in time.
So off to meet the SUNBEAM teacher, I know waaaaaaa JESS, get over it, Hailey is.

Finally, a new post!!!

2009-01-01T08:27:00.000-08:00

A lot has been going on this month.
We had a wonderful Christmas FILLED with friends and family. To start off the month of fun, we went up to Ogden and decorated Gingerbread houses with my family. We started the night off with dinner, where there was a train and the kids got train hats. We also had bought tickets to the Polar Express, back in September (when we had a job) with two of my sisters so we could be in the same train, it was so much fun. Hailey loved every minute of it. The Elf on the train asked her her name, she said Hailey Lexus Palmer and he asked her how to spell it, she said HEIL, it made me so happy she almost got it! That is good for a 3 year old right? Ryker loved it as well, until it was bedtime, then he fell asleep. Then the fun really began that night. We started our car, after everyone left, and we go to leave and our car starts shaking, Hailey says why is our car shaking, and then we pull over. She says to me, can daddy fix it? I don't want to spend the night it my car seat! I felt sooo bad. We proceeded to Checker which had closed 45 minutes before we got there, MAN! I was thinking, motel? Well, not Mike, he called Auto Zone and said do you have a store up in Heber City, and they said not yet....what does that mean...anyway, we called Brian his brother and he went to Auto Zone by his house and picked up the part that Mike "thought" we needed. We decided to go to the police station and see if they had an emergency car kit, I was sure of it. Well we get there, Mike calls the non emergency number, and they say no one is at the office but they will dispatch someone over. Well a cop came out of the building, I opened my door in excitement and said thank you, and he said for what? I shut my door and let Mike deal with him. He was a little different of a cop. He went and got us the tool we needed to take of the old part and see if it was bad. He checked the car out, and called in the plates, and asked our names. Well, in the meantime, it is so cold and the check engine light is flashing, I guess that is bad? I would have thougt that meant that it didn't know whether it wanted to stay on or not. Mike said that you should not drive with it flashing ever,who knew? Well after a long time in the cold car, the cop brought stuffed animals to the kids, and Mike asked if there was a waiting room or something, he said no. Then he went to his car, and turned around and had me open up the door and asked me if I was cold. I said yes, he said unload the kids and come in. Thank you officer for digging deap into your heart. Brian came the new part was put on and off we were home. The fix took a total of 5 minutes! I am so grateful for Mike and his smarts!
We spent a few days up in Ogden with my family. It was so much fun. We had the traditions that make the holiday, well the holiday. We have an extended family party in which I have missed the last couple of years, do to various reasons, like living out of state, and having a less than a month old. It was fun and exciting to be involved in it again. We played in all of our snow, and our car got stuck, I dug us out many times. Oh, what fun it is to slide and slip into a BIG snowbank. Memories right? We have breakfast with Santa, on Christmas Eve, and then we have a party at my Grandmas' house that evening. We also got to see my grandma pete who has recently had hip surgery, she is a trooper! This trip we switched it up a little and stayed with my sister, it was a lot of fun, and we are very grateful for her family also. I am also grateful for my aunt lois and uncle bob, they saved me this christmas season, I ran on their treadmill, everyday. I had to, I ate sooo much junk.
Well we were back just in time to put the Santa key out, because we don't have a fireplace. Hailey was real worried, how was he gonna get in? Hallmark saved us! It was such a wonderful christmas, and most of all we were together!
As for running, I have met my goals, and lots of running to go along with that. I have ran 11, and that is the highest I go. I am on the tapering end now, which is still soooo hard. I have already ran 15 miles this week! 16 more day to go, holy cow that is sooo close. Mike has been great, watching the kids for a long time, getting ready, the actual run, and the showering afterwards. I am so grateful he is letting me achieve this goal. I NEVER thought I would be able to run, or do anything for that matter. Thanks to all of you for your ongoing support also, it helps soooo much.
Well, christmas decor is down, laundry is done, and things are back to normal. The kids went to the doctor yesterday, Hailey is border line Croup- and Ryker has an ear infection. I am so grateful that we took them to the doctor and that it was a lot cheaper than ending up in the hospital, with RSV and the croup. No double rooms please!
Anyway, sorry for the long post, and once again no pictures!
Happy New Year to ALL!! Hopefully happy new job, and new insurance it us!
Jess

Well!

2008-12-01T20:28:00.000-08:00

A lot has happened here the last month. Some happened prior to the last post, but I was not ready to post about it. Mike came home on October 24, and told me over dinner preparation that he was laid off. I was so shocked. Anyway, lots of daddy time and lots of frustration in the house this last month or so. He has been working on getting a job or starting his own business, to be honest I don't think he knows what he wants to do yet. I just want him to be happy. No job yet, but at least we don't have to go through the hassle of asking for time off! Enough of that though.
Ryker got his fourth tooth today. That means I didn't get much sleep last night, but it came through today. Ryker is now 1, he turned 1 on November 15. We had a family party, and he had his own cake. This post is coming, along with pictures, Mike promised. Ryker had an earache a couple of weeks ago, and we put him on Azithromiacin, and it didn't work. So on to Amoxicillion for 10 days. Well 5 days into it, and a rash completely covers his body, our little guy is allergic to penicillion. So, we got Benedryl and Motrin and Tylenol, and it starts with an R, it's an antibiotic shot, that week was drama! He is doing better now, and I am grateful for doctors, and medicine, that can help our babies.
Hailey is so excited for Christmas. She can't wait for all the parties, candy, Santa, and giving gifts. Last night we made a gingerbread house, and she wanted it in her window seal, so cute. I am trying to teach her the real meaning of Christmas. She is so into Christmas music, and playing pretend. Today she told me, okay so your name is santa mommy, and I am coming to see you. I swear she was at the North Pole all day, funny we never left the house. This past weekend we put up some decorations and she was so happy to help me. Ryker was wrapping himself in the lights and Hailey was taking the bulbs out and handed me a big pile of them, needless to say, another day for decorating. Cute, but drove me nuts, I should do it soon though with them, these little crazy moments don't last forever!!!
I am up to eight miles now! I am so happy with this. My new running schedual is:
Monday: 6 plus miles-hills
Tuesday: 3.2 miles
Wednesday: 4 plus miles
Thursday: 2-3 miles
Friday: 2-3 miles
Saturday: 8+ miles!!!
Sunday: REST!!!
I am so happy and excited and nervous for the 1/2 marathon.
I never posted what I am thankful for, so here it goes.
I am thankful for my kids, they teach me so much, and are easy to forgive when I am not at my best or make a mistake. I am thankful for my husband, he is such an amazing person and I am so grateful for him in my life. I am also grateful that he puts up with me, and my moods. I am so blessed to have such great parents that still are teaching, loving and supporting me. I am so blessed to have 5 awesome sisters and 3 brother in laws. I love the nieces and nephews that they have blessed our family with. I am grateful for all of the wonderful friends that I have got to meet, and keep in touch with. I feel bad that I didn't wish any of them happy holidays. I was thinking of each of you and how you are such a part of who I am today. I am also thankful for exercise, and the way it makes you feel. I would like to say how grateful I am for the gospel, and the atonement, I am so in-debted to Him. I really don't know where I would be without it in my life. Last but not least, I am grateful for prayer, I know He listens and answers our prayers. I know He loves us. I hope everyone had a wonderful thanksgiving and now is gearing up for Christmas. I love the holidays, life is great. I am sure I forgot many things, but just know that I have a grateful heart tonight, and trying to make that a constant thing. I secretly am grateful for The Hills!!!

Another fun race!

2008-11-08T10:52:00.000-08:00

Today was a 5k for make a wish foundation. The race was sooo much fun. It was for a girl, and her wish was to go to Disneyland with her family. I was so happy I got to be a part of it. She is an amazing person, and because of leftover money she is donating it to someone else in the foundation. I love running for a cause, well I love running but it is always better with a purpose. I ran it in 27 minutes! I was so happy with my results. I am up to 7.1 miles now. The weather is so cold, so now we have go to the gym with the kids and we run on the track. I am so excited for Jan. 17, I can't wait. I have became addicted to running, and always wanting to be faster. It is such a rush, running 7 miles and knowing that you did it, oh, I just want to do more! I know most of you who read my blog think I am nuts.

A funny conversation, with my Hailey!

2008-10-21T16:00:00.000-07:00

So I was running yesterday, and Hailey told me to sing the song "I love to see the temple", I was singing as good as I could, breathless and all. Then I decided to talk to her about the temple.
Me:I said what do you think you do in temples?
Hailey: You pray and listen, mom.
Me: Do you think you can get married there?
Hailey: Yes, you can wear a pretty white dress.
Me: Who do you want to marry?
Hailey: Ryker
Me: Hailey, sweetie, Ryker is your brother, you can't marry him. You can marry another boy though.
Hailey: Oh, like Christopher and William and Tyler and Stetson?
Me: Oh, only one.
Hailey: Ummmm, I pick Christopher! Mom, will you come and see me get married there? Didn't you and daddy get married in a temple?
Me: Yes, we sure did.
Hailey: I want to too, mommy!
So this might be another too much information moment, in our dear Hailey's life. I am pleased to say though, that we have covered same sex marriages, multiple partners in a marriage, and incest, and most importantly where we should get married!
This made me laugh sooo hard. I was just so happy that she wants to get married in the temple. She ALWAYS talks about being baptized. I am so grateful for her, and her sweet spirit. She is so innocent, and she just soaks everything in.
On another note, Hailey always asks "So how many boys do I have in California?" It makes me laugh so hard, I say you have seven, and she is like, "oh, I need to see them!"
In this crazy world, I am so happy that Hailey is asking ME these questions, and having these conversations with me, and no one else. A big shout out to Mike for working so hard so that this is possible! Thanks honey, I love these crazy kids so much, and I sure love and appreciate you.

5k and more!!

2008-10-18T09:30:00.000-07:00

Well, today was my first 5k run! I did it in 33 minutes, that is great considering I did it with the two kids and had to stop to help them. Ryker needed his food! Hailey is normally soooo good at feeding him, but too many people, so many distractions! I was going crazy because just yesterday, 6.5 miles and NO crying, screaming, nothing and then today, the big race, and drama began and didn't stop.
Anyway, I feel pretty good about my time, even though I always want to be faster and better. I feel bad for the people running by me, crying, me saying pleeease feed him something, Hailey saying no, and Ryker crying harder. I felt sooo bad, but was sooo frustrated. I just kept saying to myself just get to the end!!!
So, the weather here has been so nuts, just this week we have ran in 39 degrees to 63degrees. It is so beautiful, it tricks you, I don't know how to dress my kids, they are either too warm or too cold. I love fall time though.
Updates on kids:
Ryker has four teeth, and is so funny. He is army crawling, and making us laugh at how fast he is. He can get in a sitting position all by himself, and can make kissy noises. He smiles all of time, and is such a fun big boy. He will be one soon, that is just crazy to me. He loves to eat, which is so opposite his sister, she could do without! He is sleeping so good at night, and is so nice in the morning! He is saying mamma and dadda, and Haigy, and more, of course!!
Hailey ate her first FULL kids meal last night, from Wendy's, I love that place, I was so proud of her. She normally just picks at her food, and Mike ends up eating what is left of it, which is normally three full nuggets, the frosty and fries. Then he gets frustrated because he spent money and she did not eat. I couldn't be more proud of her. She has had her ears painted on lately. She does not listen at all, and then when she doesn't get to do the things she wants, she is beastly, and I am not the most pleasant either. Just yesterday she told me, "mom you are crabby, are you nervous?" I have been battling nap time lately, it is not pleasant. She needs a nap, but doesn't feel like she needs one, yesterday she ended up putting herself down and when she got up she knew she was crabby so she went back to sleep. She is such a big girl, and so nice when she wants to be. I just have to remember to put myself in time out!
I love both of my kids so much. I don't mean to have days when all I want to do is scream all day, and then when they cry all I want to do is cry. Being a mom, is some hard stuff, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Busy post!

2008-09-17T15:32:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone-
Sorry it has been sooo long. A lot has happened in our little world lately.
The list of events:
Haileys' birthday party Sept. 6
Mikes' grandma passed away Sept. 4
viewing and funeral Sept. 7 & 8
Haileys' real birthday celebration Sept. 10
Haileys' doctor checkup Sept. 16
Ryker has 2 new teeth Sept.15
Ryker turned 10 months Sept.15
We put an offer on a house? Sept. 16
Plus, eating, running, and trying to sleep. EVERYDAY!!!
I have upped my miles to 6, it feels so great. I still do pilates also, so I can eat what I want when I want! Not really seeing results, maybe this is why!! hahaha
Running goal: January 1/2 marathon.

So I will now review most of the things:
Hailey turned 3, on Sept. 10. We had a party at my sisters house, for my side on sept.7. It was super fun. She got a lot of fun things. It was a dora party, so it ended with a Dora Cake, she loved it. Then because Mikes' grandma passed away, we came back that night. We went to stake conference with EVERYONE, not kidding, grandparents have 10 kids, 50 grandkids, and 26 great grandkids. We went to the conference, and we sat with them. Well, tried to, that is a funny trick to play on parents, come and listen to an apostle, and bring the kids, for 2 hours, without nursery. We did it, but barely! Then afterwards, huge BBQ at his uncles home. It was then off to get the kiddos a nap. Then that night the viewing for grandma. It was very hard on all of us. That is the grandma that we used to take care of. We still live in the basement.
It was a hard day, that Sept. 4, will not ever be forgotten. I was awakened at 6:15, because of Ryker, I try to have him stay in his crib until 7:00 am, but I went and got him. I heard a lot of noise upstairs, and thought they were just being louder than normal. I started feeding Ryker, and felt go upstairs. I stopped feeding him and opened the door, I saw the caregiver, Liza, at the top of the stairs just crying, grandpa running around in total confusion, and fireman doing CPR on grandma. I was so sad. Mike came up shortly. I am so grateful that we had the opprotunity to serve her and love her, and most of all get to know her. Mike was such a great helper and loved her dearly. He was so nice to her. She lived a very fortunate life. I am also grateful that our Heavenly Father let me see that scene, sure it was hard to wake up to, but it taught me how fragile life is, and how the little things sure don't matter. We got up and went to the hospital, she passed away, we knew it at the house, but we still went.
That day, we had to keep busy, I went to Wal-mart, and tried to keep my mind off of it. Friday, we went on a run, wal-mart again, costco, and to dinner with a lot of the family that was in town, and made midnight jam. (Mike even helped!) Then saturday, we made zucchini bread and headed to Haileys' first party. Then the viewing and the funeral on Monday. Mike got to carry her one last time, it was hard. Hailey told her thanks for letting us live with you, I love you grandma. Hailey asked to go up and see grandma and Liza a lot the first couple of days, it was a everyday thing for us to go and see them. She has gotten better lately.
Well the last party was at Chuck E Cheeses, with the Palmer side, it was a lot of fun grandpa palmer and liza both came Hailey was so happy.
We have been busy this week with doctor appointments and other fun things, like teething! Hailey is "petite" she is 35.5 inches tall, and 25.4 pounds. She is not on the chart, sad I know. But the doctor said he would rather have her on this end than on the other, me too I guess. I feel bad tho.
Ryker is 10 months and feeling good. He is finally sleeping through the night. He is saying mamma, dadda, Haigey, and clapping his hands, and playing peekaboo. He is so fun, I just wish I had more one on one time with them both. I feel like I miss out on sooo much, but I am here constantly, if that makes sense. Hailey is doing great with her potty training, no accidents for like two months, even at night. Night potty going sucks, I think I woke up 6 times last night! On sunday she got too excited and had a little accident, but nothing too big, and no setbacks. (hopefully)
If you are still here, thanks for reading and caring. I have had a lot on my mind, and just now am getting it together again.
Jess

WHAT?!?!?

2008-08-19T20:39:00.000-07:00

I know a double post from me of all people.
For this story you will need a little background. Hailey asked me what Ryker had when I was changing his diaper a long time ago, Ryker was maybe 2 months old. Well, I being honest,said he has a penis. She said a penis, well what do I have? I said you have a vagina. She now calls it agina, and penis. Well we were at church and she had her baby, mind you this was Rykers debut at church, she was waiting for the bread and water, and turns to Mike and says my baby has a penis, he is a boy. Mike says no Hailey, and she looks at it and says oh yeah, she has a agina. The people were in back of us just laughing, too bad I didn't hear it. She is pretty funny, she tells me when she sees a boy or a girl, what they have, and I can't help but laugh.
Hailey has been doing great this month with the whole potty thing. She even is doing great at night. Mike hates it, she gets up at 3:00 like on the dot every night to go potty and calls him to help her wipe! It makes me smile inside. (is that evil)
Anyway, this is what I walked in on today. Hailey said that she needed to go potty and so I said I will change Ryker and come in and help you wipe. So I go in, and laugh, she has the seat up, shorts and panties still on, and she is standing looking down, hands in position to hold her "stuff." I quickly corrected that behavior and asked her where she learned that. And she said that is what Daddy doos! It made me laugh, and I told her well we are not like daddy.
Kids do the funniest things. I am sorry I told her the correct names, she is only almost 3, I have created a monster!

What I HAVE and HAVEN"T learned: LONG!!!

2008-08-19T15:06:00.000-07:00

Well, here it goes:
I run a lot, with the kids, and always ponder when we are doing so, the last few weeks I have thought about what I have learned in my life, and what I want to learn.
Here is what I have learned:
I have learned that money does not provide happiness, you do. I have learned that communication is the key to any successful relationship especially in marriage. (I am still learning how to communicate well though) I have learned that marriage is the most awesome thing ever, if I would just let it be. I have learned that things change and people change even though you want everything to remain the same. I have learned that after moving out and away from home, your family changes or you do, and it is and never will be the same. This one has been hard on me, I never thought that this would happen. I want things to remain the same, but we are ever changing people and moving world. "Who moved my Cheese" comes to mind, awesome book about change, if anyone is interested. It has taught me how to cope with some hard stuff. I have learned that when I am in a bad mood the whole family is. I have learned that I love DRAMA! (anyone surrprised) I have learned to love, now I wish I could let my guard completetly down and be loved. This one is a hard one for me, I need to realize that I am worth being loved, and I think we all need to know that we deserve this and that we are worth it, still working on this one for now, but I am getting better. Love is great, and so hard at the same time, it is a full time job. I have learned that running is a great thing, and I wish I would have picked it up in High School, or earlier. I was soooo extremely lazy, and at the time I thought I was sooo busy and that I was doing sooo much, not even close. I have learned I need to learn how to check my emotions, I am getting better, but there is still room for improvement. I have learned that having kids is so amazing and so amazingly hard at the same time. I have learned that pregnancy is sooo hard and wonderful all at once. I have learned that delivering a little person, wow that nothing compares to it. I have also learned that I am an emotional person. I have learned that taking a time out for yourself is an amazing gift. I have learned that sleep is sooo overrated! I have learned that when you get a hall pass, you better run with it! I am learning to trust Mike more with the kids, I know this should be a given but I am the one home all day, and when I leave, it just makes me nervous. (Mike is great, when I do come home, they are all laughing and having a great time.) I am learning to live in the season of your life. I think this is so hard to do, if you're like me, I am always looking at the next thing, I need to enjoy where I am at. I have learned to load the silverware in the dishwasher with the handles down, it cleans them better, I guess. (thanks Mike) I have also learned that the proper way to wash a car is roof to bottom, I didn't know I was doing it wrong all these years. ( thanks Mike) Also, for any cleaners out there, I have learned an easy way to clean a toilet, do the back first, then the top of the seat, then lift the lid, clean that and keep going down until you reach the bowl. It is great, and I only use 4 Clorox wipes instead of like 10! I have learned that Hailey is getting big, and I need to trust her she is a good kid, and I need to give her more credit. I am learning how to be happy with the life that I am in, and living. I am learning to smile more, and laugh more. I have learned how to keep a home clean with two little kids, which is not easy. I have learned how to cook and in doing so found out I love it. (minus cinnamon rolls, hahahaha California friends know this mistake, SORRY!!!!) I have learned that I wish I would have taken piano lessons seriously, I can only play the hymns, I guess that's all that's important, but still....I have learned that friends are truly angels and that they are sent by our loving Heavenly Father, I am so grateful for each and every one of you. You have all been a very important part of my life, and I hope that that continues. I have learned that hugging my kids or anyone for that matter is just what they need sometimes. I have learned that Ryker and Hailey are such great little people, they never stop making me smile. I have learned that I need to be an example, and good example for them which is sometimes REALLY hard. I have learned that the Temple is a wonderful place, and that I don't go enough. I have learned that service is a huge part of life, and it is amazing for all who partakes, the givers and the receivers. I have learned and still am learning to recognize our blessings, that is a hard one!
I want to learn:
To love myself, to for starters like the person I am. I am really hard on myself, and I just think there is enough negativity in the world, that I should be nice to me. I need to learn to deligate, I am terrible, I just do it myself, so I know that it is done and that it is done "right." I need to learn what the words "over exercise", "over achiever", well lets face it, "over everything" means. I need to learn to trust people, and not think that they are doing things with a hidden motive. I need to learn that people are not always going to like you or be nice to you and that that is okay. I am still trying not to be too sensitive, or take things the wrong way. That is a hard one, oh I am a tender heart. I never knew that this was a bad thing. I am still learning that weighing yourself 3 or 4 times a day is not necessary, which brings me to the next point, of learning that weight does not and will NEVER matter! (Our Heavenly Father wants us to be healthy and happy, and not crazy thinking about little things like that.) It really only matters what person you are inside, and I need to learn that. Some of the happiest times in my life, were and are eating ice cream!!! I am still learning how to be a mom, and a wife, and my own person. I quite haven't got that down yet. I need to learn to be more "chill", of a person, oh I worry about the silliest things. I need to think before I speak, "open mouth insert foot" should not be part of my life anymore. I need to learn to talk less and listen more. I also need to learn more about the gospel, it is why we are here, and I don't know what I need/want to.
I know that I am not a perfect person and that I need to learn and keep an open mind always. I am just saying this is what I have learned and want to learn, and now it's down in print, so it's official. I strive to be the best person in all that I do, and sometimes I fall short. I am sorry if I have ever fallen short with any of you, and for some reason hurt your feelings. Please forgive me, I am trying hard to "fresh start" everything, and make it a better finish.
I want to know what you all think about, our minds are "kids" all day, but we are people too, and our feelings do matter. I don't know if this is a silly post or not, but there goes my worry factor in me, I hope you all can get something from this, if not anything a good laugh at me for just barely figuring this out
UPDATE ON PICTURES:
Sorry, we have been crazy nuts helping the grandparents, and living the summer life. I am not promising anything but we don't have ANY commitments this weekend so cross your fingers with me! Sorry so long, thanks for listening to my heart.

Busy, crazy, couple of days!

2008-07-24T08:58:00.000-07:00

Well, this week has turned out busier than I had thought. Tuesday night was young womens and grocery shopping, wednesday I went to my mother-in-laws home and finished two aprons, and then we went back to their home that night and Mike helped his dad in the garage, and Hailey and I painted nails and even got grandma involved. We had a lot of fun.
Today is the 24th of July, so we are having another busy day. We will go for a run in a minute, and get her buttons for her apron, and go to park day. Then we will come home eat lunch, sew her buttons on, and go shopping with Mikes mom, and then go to a fun BBQ and swim party. Our friends invited us over to their home for food and fun, what good times. Hailey had so much fun swimming, and eating chips. It was such GREAT food and friends, thanks a bunch Heidi and Joe! Ryker loved the Bumbo seat, thanks for letting us try it out, I have never seen them in use before, I am loving it. What a great idea, and mommy saver! (hands free anyone?) Then it was off to Volleyball and PIE-oneer night! It was soooo much fun. The kids came home pooped and I am wore out, but it was soooo worth it. I love going to do things and having fun people to do them with. Today was too busy and yesterday was crazy busy. I should thank Mike for coming along and being with us, he is a trooper, it was great being a family and spending time all together, it seems like we never get enough. I love him and all he does for us, and the fact that I can stay home with our kids, wow what a guy. Some might call me a financial drain!
Sorry no pictures yet, but now I have a lot more to post, so that's good right? I think tomorrow will be perfect, Friday fun night.
By the way, Ryker is almost crawling, he is scooting all over the place. Hailey says he's doing push ups, it makes me laugh. He gets on all fours and just rocks, it's cute. Ryker is also sleeping through the night, it's amazing. I love it!! Hailey is doing some funny things lately, she was in her "high tray", that is what she calls it, Mike came in to talk to me and told her he would not be very long, soon we heard from the kitchen, "for crying out loud, Mike, you have been in there forever." It made us laugh so hard, she just kept on repeating it. She is doing good, she knows all of her animals and her shapes. (I forgot to mention those last post, sorry I brag, I am just so proud of her.)

Busy summer blog!

2008-07-21T12:53:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone!
This post is going to be very busy, just a warning. So, a lot has been going on at this house this month. We hosted a party up at my mom's house for everyone. A little background is needed to explain this: my sisters and I gave "parties", "get togethers" for christmas last year instead of gifts. These are what we have done so far, we have had Chinese New Year, Zoo Day, and mine was suppose to be ice blocking and ice cream, but when we found out no more big ice blocks were being made, I didn't want to have to half cheek it! So, we ended up doing BBQ, ice cream, volleyball, and fireworks, it was so much fun! I am so grateful that we did this, it has been good times with family all year, instead of a gift that we probably wouldn't have even used, how sad is that to say?
This weekend was my softball tournament, I guess we placed first! This was the only game that I missed, and it was the final one, I took one for the team, and we took a little vacation up to Bear Lake, it was a lot of fun. This was our little familys' first time up there. We went with my ENTIRE family cousins and all. Such good times. Thanks for all the fun, food and great company. Thanks to Mike for helping out with the kids all weekend and letting me play with Hailey in the lake. Mike was so awesome, Hailey and I also got to swim in the pool, and I got to go for a run alone, it was something that I never get to do, I found myself missing the kids.
Well if that isn't enough, we have upped my miles, we run 4 everyday. I love to run, and love how I feel after. The kids love the double stroller. Today I stopped and checked on the kiddos and Hailey was holding Rykers hand, soooo cute. I love my kids. They are the best.
Ryker is now 8 months old. He is saying daddadadda and sitting up all by himself. He is rolling and scooting everywhere. He and Hailey laugh sooo much together, it is so fun to listen to that. Hailey is doing awesome. She is pretty much potty trained accidents every now and then, but not too bad. She knows her whole alphabet, and can recognize her letters. She can write her name, and count to 20. she can recognize 1-5numbers, I am working really hard with her. She is such a beautiful little girl, and so sweet. We do have our bad days, but all in all she is such a fun little girl, and such a great big sister.
We are just busy with yard work and young womens now. We have a pond, and yes weeds grow, so that means me weeding. I have been in the pond this year at the beginning of the summer, and they are back, waders back on so soon? I love yard work so this is great. Mike watches the kids while I do what I love, mowing and weeding. Sometimes I weed with Ryker in the baby carrier, I know die hard, right? Tonight is yard work night, but tomorrow we will post pictures promise, I want you all to see what a beautiful place we were at.
I also got a retainer, I know I worry so much about my smile! I want my teeth to stay in place, and they would move with my other one. So, I got a top and a bottom one, they are the invisaline kind, they are awesome. My teeth are going to be straight before I know it. I have to wear them for two months straight, it has already been a week, so it is going great. I can't eat with them, so it is great on the diet situation also. This will be my last dental thing for awhile, I got my gums fixed also. They were too low on one side of my mouth, and they made my teeth look so not straight, so I got them burned and cut basically, it is called a gingivectomy. It is awesome, loving my smile now. I will have to post a before and after. Mike said he can't really tell, but I sure can. I have had retainers since I was 7 years old, I figure I have invested so much of my life on my smile, why let it go now? I will be satisfied soon. Now on to saving money for fixing the kids smiles, Mike and I had very crooked teeth. Haileys teeth came in crooked. Thank goodness for dentists, and dental insurance!!!
So big news for me, I made an apron! I know crazy as it sounds, yes Mikes mom helped me sew my apron. This week I will sew one for Hailey that matches. They turned out really cute. I was really proud of myself. I bought some fabric for a ruffle one also for little Hailey, it is going to be so cute. I even got some truck and safety cone fabric, I am going to make Ryker one. I have so many ideas and so little time to do it all. Thank you Nancy. It was fun working with her, and hanging out at her house. Hailey ran through the sprinklers with Collin and Ryker was an angel.
I need to go get dinner going, I have blogged too much today. Next post will be nothing but pictures! (so exciting)

It was about time!!

2008-07-02T22:03:00.000-07:00

Well as you can see we have a new look. Mike and I (and of course the kids), were invited to a best friend/cousin dinner tonight. Well I got talking blogs, and Mandi was like I can help you....did she ever! Thank you for the well needed upgrade on our blog situation. The food was great and so was the company, thanks a bunch.
Thanks to Mandi I have blog buddies, cute pictures and can get from blog to blog without going to other peoples to do so, I cheated for so long, secrets out! I will hopefully be putting pictures on soon, I just need to sit down and concentrate, I know I can do it. Thanks for everything, you guys are awesome!
More to come, once I remember how to do things!!!

I can do it myself, MOM!

2008-06-19T12:19:00.000-07:00

Well, it has been a bit wild at the palmer house lately. For the last week Ryker and I have had many of sleepless sleepovers, and crying nights. It started off with a fever and then the fever disappeared, but cranky baby did not. I was tired of getting up with Ryker for the 6th day in a row, so off to the doctor he went on Tuesday. I thought he was just teething, but I wanted a justified answer to why WE weren't sleeping. He ended up having a double ear infection, and a sore throat, and yes he is teething, he is getting his VAMIRE teethe first. So, off to the pharmacy, loving the drive thru thing at Walgreens. Then we gave him his first dose. Last night with two days worth of antibiotics in his system, he slept until almost 6 am, it was amazing. I am a much better mom, when I get some sleeep. So, I thought lets go for a run and go to the park, we all need a outside day. I love my rus, even on hot days like this. Ryker is a much happier baby today, he and Hailey woke up talking to eachother, well as best as Ryker can. It was so sweet.
Today, and most days lately, little "Bugsy" (Hailey) wants to do everything by herself. Well, we went to the park, she needed to go potty, so I was helping her on, we put her fold up potty seat we take everywhere with us, helps me with the whole germ thing. Everything good right? WRONG, she got off, by herself, rubbing on the seat, so being a good person, I wiped off the toilet seat, then to my surprise, she is on the floor bear butt and all, putting on her own panties and shorts. I got her up as quickly as possible, and washed hands. Then we had lunch, she took out her straw and dropped it and put it back in her mouth. Needless to say after the FUN day at the park, we left for home. I called my mom in a panic, and said what do I do? I said I need to bath her right? So I wiped off her bumb with a wipe, and got her in the tub, clean panties and dance outfit on, she is all good, but MAN, she throws me for a loop.
Is it time for a nap yet?

A LITTLE BOY crazy?

2008-06-10T07:57:00.000-07:00

So, this is going to be a little post, but I think I should let you know. A couple of weeks ago we were getting ready for church, and Hailey said to me "mom lets bring my binoculars" (spelling?), and I said why? She said "I want them to look at boys in sacrament." I said we don't do that, and she said why? I changed the subject as fast as I could. It made me laugh, but we sit on the front row with the grandparents so I didn't think that would be very appropriate. Funny, but not good. This past saturday we had a young women breakfast, I serve in the beehives again, its the best calling, so fun. I was busy in the kitchen, and I come out to check on the family, and I hear Hailey "1, 2, 3, chase boys!" It made me laugh so hard. She chased these two boys the entire time, holding hands and all. This morning I was texting Mike and she grabbed my phone, and said "lets text boys mom," it made me think I need to post to let people know of all these funny times. Then I got thinking, how do I stop her? What am I teaching my kids?

Busy with Summer, how 'bout you?

2008-06-06T14:58:00.000-07:00

Well I know I have not kept ANY promises, so I am not going to promise anything else, I will just do it when I get the chance. Sorry to all of you who are waiting for pictures of the kids. I feel bad, I just don't know how to do it, and when Mike is home well we just don't have time for it. I know excuses, excuses. I will try harder, it's not a promise I will just try.
Anyway to give you a quick update....
Ryker is growing and kind of sleeping at night now. He was having a hard time at the beginning of this week, but for the last two nights, he just woke up once. He is eating peaches, bananas, applesauce, sweet potatos,carrots, squash, pears, and I still nurse. He is starting to put his legs under his butt and scoot, it is so funny, he goes forward on his face. Hailey never crawled, she army crawled, remember? I have a lot of fun with him, he is a good little guy. He is so content, he just cries when he is hungry and at 3:00 in the morning!! He is starting to hug, and that makes me so happy, he just smiles and laughs, he is such a joy to me.
Hailey is loving the summer. We are part of a play group that gets together at different parks, in different cities every week, it is a lot of fun and we enjoy it. She is getting along with friends so well, I am happy about that. I worry about her, but I see the way she is around other little kids and I am very proud of her. It was so funny, this little girl pushed her and she turned around and said "hey you can't push me", then she came over to me and wanted a hug. She is doing excellent with the whole potty thing, to be very frank, it is about damn time!!! I cannot believe how hard she has been to potty train. I hope we have hit success, no accidents for like a week, and she tells me everytime she needs to go, even when we are out places, it's amazing. I keep a accident calender, I know what a nerd, but I got counting, 18 accidents in March, 12 in April, and 10 in May, and none so far in June. We will have to make another trip to Chuck E Cheeses. She is quite a little helper, a little mommy to all of her "Ryker" baby dolls, and she loves to cook, her specialty is "blue soup for Jesus", she loves her "spicies", she is so funny. I sure am glad that I get to stay home with my kids and see them grow, and raise them.
Mike and I will be celebrating our 6th anniversary, at the end of the month. We are headed for a day trip with the kids, we are so excited to be a family out of the house, and shopping!!! I can't wait. We love each other so much, marriage is not always easy, but if you can get through the tough times, you can get through anything. In words of Dr. Phil "do you want to be right or do you want to be happy." I have to remember those words quite often. I am sure glad that he puts up with me, thanks for the good times we have had together, and thanks for growing with me. I am so grateful for the father he is to my kids, he is so great and I know that Hailey and Ryker adore him. Happy Anniversary and Happy Father's Day. I love you.

Facing my fears!

2008-05-16T20:28:00.000-07:00

This is how the day started.....
So I woke up in a frantic last night because I had went to the softball game without a mitt. I was so embarrassed I did not go back and went to Home Depot and bought A LOT of tile..don't ask, this was my dream. I thought I was going to have softball stomach ache all day long, and then it happened, a distraction. I cleaned my whole house, bathrooms and all, before 9:30am, what was I going to do with the day, so many hours before the game. I decided to go for a run, I finished too fast, it was kind of hot today so I didn't want to go any further. We came home, and we went and saw the grandparents, then Ryker needed to eat, so downstairs we went. Then we had lunch and early naps, what, EARLY naps, seriously the kids were not cooperating, with my hopes of making the day go fast. Then it happened I decided to call the doctor because I was having some chest pain, and it hurt to even sleep last night. Well I got an appointment and moved Rykers well baby check to today, we both got checked over and we both are in pain. Ryker weighs 16 pounds and is 27 inches long plus he got shots, poor guy, he is so brave. When the nurse came back into the room, Hailey told her "don't poke my brother". It was so cute, she then told him "be brave". As for me, I have an infection, thank goodness, I was so worried that a big cancer lump had formed over night. It hurt so bad, I kept having Ryker eat on that side to hopefully feel some relief, none came. I thought for some reason I was engorged, but on only one side, never has happened like this before. The best thing is she prescribed me an antibiotic that is okay to still nurse, so awesome. So, that took up a lot of time right? It was great, a good distraction, for a scary night with a bat. Mike came home at 5:20pm, my hopes were to leave at 5:30pm, well not happening. We ate, well kind of, I didn't feel like eating, I was so nervous. We showed up at the game, and it all left me, I love the smell of the field, the running in the dirt, and putting your hands up to block the sun so you don't get hit with a fly ball or a line drive. Let's back up a minute, the reason I am so frightened is because while I was playing pitcher, I got a line drive in the face. I almost broke my nose, it hurt, and scarred me for life...well until tonight. I was playing outfield, and I LOVED it. I was sitting on the bench waiting for my turn to bat, and they yell she needs a runner, I said I can run, so I got to run the bases. Man, I love running. I got to bat twice, and well I walked the first time, good eye right? On that one, I ran the bases and I scored! Hailey was behind the fence, good job mom. I loved that. Mostly, because when we were leaving the house she said to me, better bring the camera this is going to be good. The second time I hit and they caught. MAN, but I got someone to third. I forgot the rules kinda, being right field I need to back up first base right, well I didn't and 2 runs came in, I felt so stupid, I just said "my bad, sorry", they didn't seem to care, but really I forgot that. Hopefully it will all come back soon. In the end we lost 13 to 6, but we played good. GO TEAM!!! I was so proud of myself for facing my fear, and getting back in the game. I hope I will continue to play sports, and be active. I love the feeling of being out there, and having something all my own. Did I ever mention that this is co-ed? The guys in the league are super supportive of us girls playing. Thanks for all your support.
Then I faced another fear, our theme for girls camp is "bootcamp", so we were to pick a certain boot that we wanted to be, we picked wonder women boots, so we wore red shirts, red capes, stars on our heads, and tin foil on our wrists, and of course red boot covers. We danced at the ward talent show. It was so funny. I am so glad that no one recognized me, anyway, that is not like me. We are wonderful women, right?
Mike and I don't have the grandparents this weekend so, we are going to the zoo tomorrow after we get our family photos taken. I will have him help me put probably photo overload on our blog. So check out the pictures on monday. I will do this, promise.
Here is to facing your fears, and no more weird dreams!!!

Little angels, that I love!!!

2008-05-14T21:24:00.000-07:00

Well hello friends. It has been a long time since I have blogged, and posted pictures. I have the best intentions...sorry I am so bad.
We made it to Chuck E Cheeses! That was Haileys' prize for going potty, along with a laptop. She always wants to check her e-mu (email), so we did a sticker chart and she had to go 10 days with no accidents, it took her 15 but she did it. She has done sooo good. I sure love her. She now tells me, "my belly says, Hailey, you better get on the potty, it's coming out!" I sometimes ask her "what is your belly telling you", and she says nuffin! I don't know what made her want "Chuppy Cheeses", but that is all I heard about. Fun, Games, and Pizza, it truly is a place where a kid can be a kid! When she would have a accident, she would say "so I guess no chuppy cheeses, man," it drove me nuts, that went on for like 5 months, no joke. You see those kids that would feel so bad that they had a accident, well not Hailey, she would say "let's get in the tub, no toys, this is not a fun tub mom." Today her friend had a accident at our house, and she told her "don't worry things happen." She is such a sweetie, she always tells me that I am her best friend, I hope that never changes. When we get upset with each other, she says "mom I am a little person, be nice." She really is teaching me how to be a mommy.
Ryker is getting soooo big. He is rolling all over the place, and is just so flippin' cute. He is now eating rice cereal, and sweet potatos. He will try carrots tomorrow, I just love feeding him. I still nurse him, I hopefully will do that until he is 13 months, like I did Hailey. He is starting to laugh so much, and just talk to us. He is so funny. He is a great baby, I couldn't ask for a better baby, I just wish this amazing baby didn't want to see me at night anymore. He still wants to eat in the middle of the night, it drives me nuts. He is 6 months, he doesn't need to eat at night, and with how big he is, he certainly does not need to. I would let him cry it out, but we live with Mikes' grandparents, and well we have tried to let him cry, and I end up making breakfast for them because I feel so bad. Waffles anyone, just live above us!! Needless to say, I am still feeding him once in the night.
So, you wanna laugh? I am on a softball team again. I have not played in like 10 years, I am so scared. The first game that I will play in is on Friday night, I hope it rains!! I am so frightened that I will strike out, or get hit with the ball, but I feel that I need to face it again. I used to pitch on a recreation team, I played for 12 years. I feel I am in much better shape now than I was then. I am running 2 miles a day and doing pilates everyday. I am almost at my target weight, just if my coordination comes back. Keep me in your prayers!! Go ahead and laugh, my parents and sisters did. They couldn't believe I was on a team again. I said, thanks for the support! I think Mike and Hailey will laugh as well, Mike has never seen me actually play sports on a team, well this will be exciting for everyone.
I will try to post pictures, but really don't hold your breath. We are getting pictures taken this weekend, so I will try to put those on the computer, with Mikes' help. I am getting this family of four thing down, I actually don't feel stressed out every minute of every day, just some!!! Then dinner time comes, and everyone is hungry and mean, and then I remember, oh ya we are done!!!
So until next time, see ya!

This is what is happening in the Palmer house!

2008-04-18T14:59:00.000-07:00

Sorry I haven't posted for awhile...I think I am done with this blog stuff. Let's face it, I am not good and I don't post.
This is the update...Hailey has gone 7 days and 8 nights without an accident, I know what you are thinking great she finally got it I was so happy...then she had an accident on the couch today, this was a weird accident though she always used to stand and have accidents this time she was sitting I think she thought if I am sitting maybe it won't come out. Chucky Cheeses is in her future though. She has hit 25 pounds we are so proud of her. She is doing a lot better at being a big sister and she is acting a lot better as well. She loves to play and have fun and she makes everyone laugh. She knows how to count to 17 (random huh) and knows all of her letters and how to say the alphabet. She sings all of the time, she is so funny. She sings this lamb is your lamb this lamb is my lamb, so funny. She loves to exercise with me, and she says I want to be toned like you mom. I hope I am not damaging her, I am kind of a freak about it all.
Ryker is growing so much. He weighs about 17 pounds and is so long. He is in 9-12 month clothes, Hailey was barely in these when she was a year old, he is only 5 months. He rolled over today, and thinks it is pretty neat so he keeps doing it. He gets stuck on his belly and makes grunting noises, he is so funny. He smiles a lot, and laughs at Hailey when she is throwing a fit, it is pretty funny.
Mike and I are doing fine. We are just so busy. Spring is in the air which means cleaning for me, and getting rid of things....DI here we come. Mike can't wait to get great weather so that he can ride his motorcyle, he is a temperature waaaa so he needs it to be warm and not windy at all. We are loving spring weather, and spring clean up. Just last week I was in our back yard pond, yes waders and all, it was so much fun. I lost a water shoe, but no fish were killed and all the weeds are out. This week has brought on new projects, I have cleaned out everything. I have donated so much, and it feels so good. My theory is why have it and never see it until we are moving....so goodbye to things that need a good home !!! I finally got rid of all my clothes that don't fit me, yes maternity too, (we are done), at least thats what I think. I feel so clean, it is weird but knowing that I don't have to see any of that or move any of those things makes me feel soooo good.
Mike was a little mad, so if you do this, do this when your husband is gone, and make sure the mess is out of sight before he gets home. He shouldn't have been mad, I didn't touch the garage, as a matter of fact none of his stuff was touched, he is just a keeper of junk, and I am turning over a new leaf, or two. Mike asked me why this mid life crisis...do you think this falls under that? Cleaning=crisis? It made me laugh, inside of course.
I will post pictures of everything tonight with Mikes help. I am sorry, but I probably won't post for awhile. I guess I was not cut out to be part of blog world. I love to look at all of yours, but creating one, MAN!
Love you all, and thanks for being my friend.

Blessing Day for our Ryker

2008-03-02T17:04:00.000-08:00

Mike blessed Ryker today, and did a great job. We decided to do it at our house this time. Ryker was having a pretty hard time, and once we settled him down and the prayer started, he was an angel, it was amazing. These little kids are so sweet and so close to the Lord, it is amazing. I am so glad that Mike is a worthy priesthood holder and that he can bless our kids. We sure love them and are hopefully good parents for them.
We waited for flu season to end, and Spring to come, it was a beautiful day. Mikes mom was nice and thoughtful, she let us borrow the outfit that Mike got blessed in, isn't that neat? It fit him, and looked very nice, thanks Nancy. We had a lot of family and some ward members come over for the blessing and then we had a feast. Thanks to everyone who brought food, and cooked it too.
We would like to thank all those who traveled so far to come down to this very special day for Ryker. It was great fun, and awesome company and hopefully some good food too. Hopefully everyone got home safely. We really appreciate all the love and support we feel from you all. We will post some pictures of the party soon.
We missed all of our loved ones in California, we wish we could have celebrated this special day with you as well. We hope to come to California soon, we miss you all so much, we need to come. Thanks again, we love you all.

LONG TIME, NO BLOG!!!!

2008-02-17T19:44:00.000-08:00

Hello friends:
This is my first time doing this, you could say that I am a blog virgin...please try to understand mistakes. Sorry it has been so long. The days just come and go, and I am lucky to have a shower!

Here is what we have been up to, we have been exercising a lot, and watching Hailey and Ryker learn to get along and be great friends. Ryker is getting so big, and Hailey is still trying to be a potty champion. Mike is still at Prosper in Provo, and loving his work. I am just trying to keep my head on, and the pounds off!! I love to be able to exercise again, and the kids seem to enjoy it as well. Hailey and I do Pilates and "Bunny Bootcamp", it is so much fun. Mike got our family Orem Fitness center passes, we have already been a couple of times, Hailey loves to run around the track and swim. Mike is looking forward to playing basketball and lifting weights. I am looking forward to running inside, it is sooo cold outside, and getting the chance to run on the tread mill. We are trying to keep warm and trying to keep healthy. We miss California and our friends sooo much.

We will try to post more often. Here are some current pictures of the fam. Enjoy!

Jess, Hailey, and Ryker

Mike

RykerRyker is getting so big, and smiley!Hailey and Ryker
Our Hailey Bug loves to ROCK OUT!!!!

Elfed out

2007-12-27T12:30:00.000-08:00

We got all elfed out for Christmas. Here is a link if you want to check it out: http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1464850138

Happy holidays everyone!

Hello

2007-12-27T12:24:00.000-08:00

Hello World. Here is our blog. We will add more content as we have time. For now, here is a quick picture of Ryker Gauge. He was born November 15th, 2007. He weighed 7 pounds and was 21 inches long.